


Drunk Words

by PerriewinkleNerdie



Category: Open Heart (Visual Novel)
Genre: Eventual Smut, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-31
Updated: 2019-08-31
Packaged: 2020-10-04 01:08:21
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 27,305
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20462537
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PerriewinkleNerdie/pseuds/PerriewinkleNerdie
Summary: Too much alcohol, too many words, and sober regrets.





	1. I

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, hello, hello!  
This series started with a one shot that grew into something much bigger. Slow burn is real, I'll say that :D  
Enjoy! <3

His voice had never sounded so cold. And the worst thing was, Claire had no idea what triggered that reaction in him.

She came by his office because she needed advice and he was the only one she could turn to these days, well, except for Naveen.

Her mother was sick, dying in the hospital back in her hometown and she had no idea what to do. Her heart was torn between going there to be with her like she wanted and staying here like her mother said she should.

So far, only Naveen knew about this. She found out two weeks ago and he noticed something was wrong, asked her and the dam just broke. He helped her get through the initial stages of grief and panic, cheered her up a little. The old man became one of the two people in Boston she felt like she could trust with anything, the other one being Ethan.

Claire really didn’t understand what his whole outburst was about. She was standing there, in the middle of his office, dumbfounded, stunned by his word.

“How could you do that?” he said, his words cold, colder than she imagined possible, looking straight at her, glaring, trying to break her.

“What happened? What do you mean?” confusion in her voice seemed to reel him up even more.

“You told Harper about Miami? Seriously, what is _wrong_ with you?!” he shouted, taking her aback.

_“What? _What are you talking about?” she could believe his words. Harper Emery somehow found out about their kiss and he thought _she_ was the one who told her?

“Harper came by my office an hour ago, said that _you_ told her that we…”

“That we _what_, Dr. Ramsey?”

“That we _kissed_, Dr. Herondale. She said you were the one who told her.”

“I didn’t do it. I don’t know how she knows about it, I didn’t tell her.”

“Why would she lie? What would be the point of her not telling the truth?”

“I don’t know…” she was interrupted by his outburst of anger yet again.

“Really, Claire?! I reject you and you cannot act like an adult about it? Instead you run to our boss and tell her about it to humiliate? You’re acting like a _child_ and I…”

“_Stop. Just stop_. It’s not what I came here to talk about and, quite frankly, I don’t want to talk to you anymore. I don’t have to listen to this.” She turned on her feet and walked out of his office, not looking back and not listening to him calling her out for being a coward.

She planned on hiding in the supply closet and crying her eyes out but she still had to check on Naveen, so instead she made her way to his room, seeking some comfort from the conversation.

Turns out that Claire’s grandfather, a surgeon, and Naveen know each other. What that means is that he also knows her mother, not as good as her grandmother but he remembers her. That was a great deal to her, finding someone in here that resembled her a piece of family so far away from her own.

Claire entered his room, finding Naveen awake, reading a book. He turned to look at her and when he saw distress on her face and reached his hand out for her to take, she broke apart.

Tears started flowing freely, not caring about him seeing her in that state.

“Claire, sunshine, what is going on? What happened?” Naveen started calling her _sunshine_ when he remembered how her grandfather called her that exact name in one of his letters to him.

She told him what happened, how her mother’s state was getting worse and worse, how she just _had_ to take a few days off and fly home to be with her, how Ethan jumped on her with accusations that had nothing to do with the truth, how he called her a child and a coward…

He didn’t know how to react. Claire was disintegrating right before his eyes, all the stress from the last two weeks has finally taken its toll on her and crushed her under its weight.

“Okay, here is what you’re going to do. Take a deep breath.” He looked at her and waited for her to comply, her shoulders moving up and down slowly. “Just like that. Now, you’re going to go to Dr. Emery and ask for a few days off because you _are_ going to your mother. No one should be alone in sickness.” He smiled warmly at her, patting her hand gently. “You don’t have to tell anyone where you’re going if you don’t want to. And don’t worry about Ethan, I’ll take care of it.” his voice became stern.

“Naveen… thank you. For everything.” She took a deep breath through her nose and tried to smile at him, softly, but it came out broken.

“You don’t have to thank me, sunshine. Now, go be with your mother and hug your family from me.” With one final hug and a smile she left the room.

Without saying or explaining much to Harper, she took a few days off. She didn’t say anything to anyone, not even her roommates, leaving a note on the counter in the kitchen explaining she’ll be gone for a couple of days. She left and went to be with her family, dividing her life in Boston and her life back home with a big line.

Two weeks. Two weeks went by since he last saw her.

Ethan was distressed. And confused. And _hurt._

_Why_ would she do that? What was her plan? What was her point in running to Harper and telling her about their moment of passion?

His mind couldn’t grasp it, couldn’t understand how she could have thought this was okay.

Nevertheless, he hasn’t seen her since she ran out of his office that day. He thought she was just with Ines or Zaid, but they haven’t seen her either.

With all of his other options gone and his patience at an all-time low, he asked other interns but got the answer that didn’t satisfy him.

“She left. We came one day back home and there was a note, she said she doesn’t know how long she’ll be gone but she needs some time for private reasons.”

Huh. So she was running away from him now. it didn’t sound like Claire, his Claire was courageous, brave and not that hard to break. And she certainly wasn’t the one to run away like a coward when things got heated.

… except she did. Twice. Two times he saw her do it, and it made him think that maybe he didn’t know her as well as he thought he did.

Meanwhile, Naveen’s results were picking up slowly, but surely. What did concern him was the fact that his mentor’s demeanor towards him has somehow changed. He became colder, stricter, almost as if he was mad at him for something and was waiting for an explanation.

Ethan decided to ask him if he knew anything about Claire disappearing so suddenly.

“Yes. I do actually. She took time off to fly back home to be with her mother, she’s on her deathbed as we speak.” Naveen’s voice was emotionless, carving holes in Ethan with every word.

“_What?_ Why didn’t she tell me anything?”

“She _tried_. But the day she wanted to tell you, you jumped on her with those stupid accusations about her running off to Harper and telling her about the kiss.”

“They were not stupid accusations, Harper said…”

“How many times Harper said something that wasn’t true _just_ to gain from it?” Naveen interrupted him, anger rising in his chest. _Now_ he was going to give him a piece of his mind. “Do you _really_ think that Claire would do something like that? Seriously? Where is that brain of yours, Ethan?”

“Then how…” Ethan sat down by his mentor’s bed, digging in his own head, trying to remember _anything_ to help him understand what happened those two weeks ago. And then, like a lightning from the sky, he realized what was wrong.

“_Oh god, no._” he whispered, pained and exhausted.

“What is it?”

“Claire wasn’t the one who told Harper about our kiss. _It was me_.” He said, horrified with what his brain finally remembered.

“What are you talking about?” Naveen was confused, not getting where the young attending was going with his words.

“We went to the bar for a drink, celebrating a deal or something like that. I got drunk and we started talking about stuff from outside of work and it just…_ slipped_.”

“So, do you now see what I’ve been trying to tell you all this time?” Naveen tried one last time to make him see reason.

“What do you mean?”

“Harper used the fact that you’re drunk to get information out of you and then, when she was sure you didn’t remember anything, she told you she knows from _Claire_. What do you think she wanted to accomplish by that?”

It dawned on him like a bucket of ice-cold water.

“_She wanted to drive us away from each other so Aurora could win the competition…_” he whispered, finally connecting the dots.

“Exactly. And you fell for it, without stopping for even a second to think it through. And now you’re paying the consequences.” At the confused look on Ethan’s face, he went on. “It’s going to take a _lot of work and time _for her to forgive you. Sunshine is going through a rough patch right now, her mother is dying and she’s alone.”

“_Sunshine?_” Ethan smiled softly, a question in his words.

“Ah, yes. You don’t know. I am friends with Claire’s grandfather, last time I saw him Claire’s mother was ten years old. In one of his letters to me he called his granddaughter ‘_sunshine_’ and it just stuck with me.” A smile appeared on Naveen’s face, remembering the young doctor.

“Her mother is dying? And she didn’t tell me? How long have you known?”

“About two weeks before she left. I noticed she was sad and asked what happened. She broke down and told me everything. From that point forward we tell each other everything.”

“So… you knew for a _month_ that something was not right, and you didn’t tell me? You saw how distressed I was, not knowing where she was for the last two weeks and you let me _suffer like that?_”

“Ethan, do you have _any_ idea what you did to her? Do you remember what words came out of your mouth in your little fit of anger?”

“I...”

“You called her a _child_. _A coward_. That is now how you are supposed to act. Towards anyone, and sure as hell not towards _her._ So don’t give me this crap about how I didn’t tell you about where she is. Man up. you made a huge mistake, now you have to make it up to her. Although, if we’re being honest, I don’t know if she’ll forgive you.” he finished his lecture and looked at him, waiting for his reaction.

The full weight of what he did when he last saw her fell down on him, brining him hard towards the ground.

“_What have I done?_”

Another week went by before Claire came back to Boston. Making her way straight to Naveen’s room to greet him, bringing him a box of treats and a few things her grandfather wanted her to pass on to him.

“Claire’ darling, you’re back! How are you?” Naveen smiled widely at the young woman standing before him. She looked well rested and happier, lighter almost.

“I’m good, thank you.” she smiled back at him. “I brought you something. It’s from my grandfather. And my family. A little something to help you get by.” She handed him the box and sat down on his bed.

“So, sunshine, how is your mother?”

“Good. She managed to fight it and she survived. We’re all so thankful for the doctors there, amazing people.” She laughed out of happiness.

“You have no idea how relieved I am to hear that. Let’s hope I get to see them all soon.” His voice became grim, but she squeezed his hand reassuringly.

“You will. I promise you.”

They talked a little and she went back towards the main part of the hospital, changing into her work clothes and going back to her routine.

Ethan entered Naveen’s room, file in his hands, not looking up from them. His mentor noticed how tired and distressed he was, dark circles under his eyes, the corners of his lips down, his shoulders slumped.

“Good morning, Ethan.” His voice was happy and that was probably what made the young attending look up.

His eyes noticed the box by his bed, open and a few of the things taken out.

“What is it?” he pointed towards the box, eyes flicking down towards the papers again.

“Oh, that? Claire brought it for me from her grandfather.” Naveen was waiting for Ethan’s brain to catch up on what he just said and he didn’t disappoint.

“_Claire?_ She’s here?” his voice betrayed how relieved and happy he was.

“Yes. She came back this morning, came by my room before her morning rounds. I haven’t seen her since, so my guess is that she’s already working.”

Ethan was running before he even knew what he was doing. Making his way towards the entrance hall he noticed a few of the doctors there.

And then her saw _her_.

Claire was standing there, her roommates by her side, talking about something. She was already in her everyday clothes, so her shift has ended.

“Dr. Herondale!” he called out, her name almost slipping from his lips, but he stopped himself on the very last moment.

She turned around to look at him and immediately turned back around, saying something to her friends before making her way towards the exit of the hospital.

He ran after her, not wanting to let her go. Not this time.

It was pouring. Rain was falling from the sky, as though it was crying for both of them.

Ethan reached out for her hand, making her stop and look at him.

“Claire, wait. You’re back.” He was so happy to see her again, he had to apologize and explain everything to her.

“Yes, I’m back. Is there something else?” it was now her turn to be cold towards him, letting him taste his own medicine.

“How is your mother?”

“She’s okay, they saved her. It that all?” she really didn’t want to talk to him. Not now, not in this rain, not ever again.

“Claire I… _It was me._”

“I don’t follow. What did you do?” she was confused, and he knew why.

“I was the one who told Harper about the kiss.”

“_You did what?_” she seethed through her teeth, anger slowly climbing towards her breaking point.

“I got drunk and told her. I didn’t remember doing it, but she did remember me saying it. And she decided to use that against me. _Against us._ _I’m sorry_.”

“Sorry for what? Sorry for accusing me of doing something like this? Sorry for pushing me away when I needed you the most? Sorry for calling me a child, _a coward?_ Sorry for kissing me?”

At her last words he took a step closer, looking deep into her eyes.

“You know I could never regret kissing you.” he whispered before mustering up all the courage he could and taking her in his arms, a familiar feeling of home and peace taking over his senses.

Their lips touched and he felt as though he died and went straight to heaven. He didn’t think he’d be able to kiss her again and now that he did, he wasn’t sure if he would ever be able to stop.

They were both soaking wet, rain still pouring, drenching them in cold water. He pulled her closer to him, trying to shield her.

He didn’t have to make himself stop kissing her. She did that for him.

Her hands landed on his chest, pushing him away, taking a step back, holding her hand up.

“_This_ doesn’t solve anything. You can’t just do that. You can’t hurt me like that and expect me to just jump back into your arms because you suddenly decided you no longer care who knows what happened. _It doesn’t work like that, Ethan._ I’m sorry, but I’m not strong enough to do this right now.”

She turned around and ran away, leaving him there alone in the rain, hurt and with no one to turn to.

He fell to his knees, broken and hurt, hot tears falling down his cheeks, masked by the raindrops falling down his face. He brought it upon himself. It was his fault.

_And he didn’t know what to do._


	2. II

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You can't undo the past... but you can make up for your mistakes.

It was late. The moon was high in the sky, the room was illuminated with the soft light. Peaceful atmosphere was in the air, but he didn’t feel it.

He was trashing in his bed, his limbs tangling in the sheets, his breathing labored, head turning from side to side.

Ethan woke up with her name on his lips, a pained whisper, trying to summon the image of her before his eyes. He was wet with sweat, unable to calm himself.

It happened again. Third time this week. And it was Tuesday. He tried everything, _everything_ he could to stop thinking, to will his mind to turn off, but nothing was working.

He just couldn’t escape her.

Ethan got out of bed, detangling his legs from the wet sheets, deciding he need to drink some water to calm his nerves.

Leaning on the counter in his kitchen he closed his eyes, a glass of cool liquid in his hand. Their last conversation still ringed in his ears, taunting him, haunting him his every waking moment.

“_… You can’t just do that. You can’t hurt me like that and expect me to just jump back into your arms because you suddenly decided you no longer care who knows what happened. It doesn’t work like that, Ethan. I’m sorry, but I’m not strong enough to do this right now…”_

A loud crash was heard in the room. Ethan looked to his right, searching for the source of the noise.

He threw a glass against the wall.

Ethan felt helpless. He didn’t know what to do to make it stop. The ringing in his head. The screaming in his ears, the chaos taking other his mind.

His body slumped against the wall heavily, sliding down slowly until he sat down, falling asleep, exhausted.

He woke up a few hours later, first rays of sunshine blinding him. He groaned, standing up slowly, forgetting about the broken pieces of glass. His hand, that he put on the ground to lift himself, made contact with the sharp objects.

“Fuck!” he shouted, bringing his hand back up quickly, picking out the pieces, blood flowing out of the wounds. He went to the bathroom, patching himself up and getting ready for a day at work.

It was now four days after their conversation in the rain. People started talking, whispering behind their backs about the kiss they witnessed. But neither of them seemed to notice or care.

Meanwhile she refused to talk to him about anything except work. Naveen was mediating them both, talking with them and making them talk to each other.

Ethan finally decided to confront Harper. He wanted to know just why she thought messing with him, messing with them both, was the right things, what made her think she could do that.

He strode into her office, closing the door behind him, catching her off guard, nor letting her think of any excuses.

“I waited long enough. I am done. Tell me why.” He sat down opposite of her.

“I don’t know what you mean.”

“You know damn well what I mean, Harper. Don’t make me even more mad than I already am. Why did you say that?”

“Ethan, why would I not tell you exactly what she told me? I don’t want you to get hurt…”

His hand slammed on top of her desk, a loud noise ringed through the space they were in.

“Don’t lie to me! I know what happened, I remember our conversation. I don’t need your meaningless excuses. I just need to know _why._” The last thing that came out of his mouth became a breathless, strangled whisper.

“I…” Harper was stunned. She knew that he would react excessively, but she had no idea just how far she reached inside of him. His feelings for the young intern ran deeper than she thought.

“It’s funny how you can’t say anything now. Yet you didn’t seem to have that problem when you chose to use your words to turn me against Claire. I’m going to make it easy for you.” he leaned forwards, his hand on the edge of her desk, looking at her. “Did you do it so you could distract me from her and make me choose Aurora for the team?”

It happened so fast he could have missed it if he blinked. But he didn’t. Harper’s resolve broke for a moment, her face twisting and immediately going back to her usual neutral state.

“… yes. I did.” She said quietly, avoiding eye contact. Her head was hanging low, embarrassment evident in her posture.

“At least you own up to your mistakes. Hear me when I say this, from this point forward, every interaction we have is strictly professional. You are a good friend, Harper, but I won’t let you sabotage my only chance at happiness in life. That’s not what friends should do to one another.” He shot her one last look before walking out the door.

He felt better. Lighter. The ghost of the whole situation with Harper was floating over his head for the last few weeks. It felt good to finally let go of that burden.

Now he had to find a way to convince Claire to talk to him. That would prove to be difficult, given the fact that she didn’t want to see him, and he understood that. He understood _her._

He couldn’t wrap his head around his own actions. For a man that didn’t take risks and made calculated moves, he acted purely on his emotions.

Every time he thought he would finally talk to her, she slipped from his grasp, changing the direction she was walking in, talking to someone else or using some excuse to get out of the conversation with him. That’s how his idea came together in his head.

\---------

It was late yet again, when he found himself on the doorstep of her apartment’s building. He made his way up the stairs, floor by floor, getting closer to her with each step. And his body felt it. His muscles tensed, his breathing was accelerating, and it had nothing to do with his movement.

Finally, he stood before her door, the most nervous he’s ever been. He never had to chase anyone. He never _wanted_ to convince anyone to try. Yet with her it was different.

He raised his hand and knocked on the door before he could talk himself out of it and run for his life. A young woman answered the door. Dr. Trinh stood before him, looking surprised to say the least.

“Dr. Ramsey? If you don’t mind me asking, what are you doing here?”

“I don’t mind. I need to talk to Cla… Dr. Herondale. Is she home?” he stuttered, changing her name to her title and surname last second, no longer sure if he _could_ use her nickname.

“Uh, yeah, she’s in her room. Do you want me to call her?”

“No. if you don’t mind, I’d like to speak to her privately. I won’t be long, I promise. I wouldn’t want to impose and disrupt your free time.”

“Oh, okay. Follow me.” She let him in, closing the door behind him before leading him towards the room at the end of the hall, pointing.

“That’s her room. We’ll be in the living room if either of you needs anything.” She smiled softly at him before leaving him to his own thoughts.

He hesitated. What if she didn’t want to see him? Not now, not ever? It was too late to back out now. Even if he didn’t see her, her friends would tell her he was here.

His hand hovered over the door, knocking on it sharply three times before entering the room upon hearing a soft “Come in”.

Her room was bathed in the soft light of a floor lamp, walls were painted in light color, in the middle of the room was a big bed.

Claire was sitting on a small loveseat by the window, a blanket thrown over her legs and midsection, a book in her lap, more than a half already read, a cup of steaming liquid in her left hand. She noticed she wasn’t alone after a few moments that he used to take her in.

“Dr. Ramsey? What are you doing here?” she was surprised, but not mad. That’s good, not a bad sign.

“I couldn’t sleep. Or, for that matter, do anything else. I had to see you.” he confessed, looking at her, his eyes not daring to stray from hers.

“Ethan…” his heart soared when she said his name. He thought he was a lost case, never to hear her say it again. Suddenly she gasped, placing her book on the small table and racing towards him. _“What happened to your hand?”_ she took his hand delicately in her smaller ones, careful not to hurt him more than he already was.

“I… may have thrown a glass against the wall. I also may have fallen asleep against the said wall and forgotten that the glass was there…” he was avoiding her eyes, embarrassed at his own behavior.

“Oh god, why would you do that? Are you okay?” she was clearly concerned, worried about him. He didn’t want to trouble her with his problems, she had enough of her own, she didn’t need him to add on to that. He raised his eyes to meet hers.

“I need to talk to you. _Please, let me talk to you._ I have to get this off my chest, explain everything to you. And afterwards, if you still want me gone, I’ll go.”

“_I don’t want you gone._ It’s just that… I’m still hurt. _You hurt me, Ethan._ I just…” she moved towards her bed, patting a spot next to her. “Come here.” She whispered.

He didn’t hesitate for even a second, sitting down by her side but keeping his distance, respecting her space.

“Okay… now tell me what exactly happened with Harper.”

Ethan began telling her the story, not omitting anything, pouring his heart out to her. She listened patiently, staying quiet. After he was done he looked over at her, desperate for a reaction, _any reaction_, but he got nothing. She was silent, processing everything she just heard.

“Claire… Claire, say something. _Please, say something._ I can’t stand you being so quiet.”

She placed her hand on his hesitantly to calm him down enough for him to listen to her.

“So… you gave me a lot to think about. Thank you for being honest with me.” She smiled a little, her eyes sparkling slightly.

“I know I hurt you. I know I have anger issues and I have trouble keeping my emotions at bay, under control. I want to be better. I _need_ to get better, because you deserve the best, Claire. Let me prove to you how much I care, want, _need_ _you._ _Please._”

He saw it in her eyes. She was hesitating, not sure what to do.

“Ethan…”

“You don’t have to answer me now. All in it’s own time. Only when you’re ready. I’m not going to make you or pressure you into taking me back, even though there wasn’t a relationship between us. Because there were other things between you and me, and now I’m ready to admit that. I can only hope you still think there_ are _things between us.”

“I… I’ll have to think. Long and hard. Thank you, Ethan.” They both stood up, noticing how late it was. He brought her hand, that he still had in his own, to his lips and kissed it softly and slowly, savoring the feeling for as long as he could.

“Goodnight, Claire.”

‘Goodnight, Ethan.”

\-------

The next day Claire was walking down hall with Sienna, both had files in their hands, consulting quietly on a patient.

“How are you holding up? I let in dr. Ramsey yesterday, he looked distraught. Are you okay? You know, after the kiss…”

“Yeah, I’m fine. We cleared the air, talked about the source of our argument… It’s good now.”

“So is something going to happen?” she asked, nudging Claire’s shoulder playfully. She blushed, looking away.

“I don’t know. I guess we’ll have to see.”

They stopped when a voice called out her name.

“Dr. Herondale!” she turned around to see Ethan walking in their direction.

“I’ll talk to you later?” saying goodbye to Sienna she made her way towards him, meeting him in the middle of the hall.

“Here you go. For you.” he handed her a cup of warm liquid. She leaned forward to sniff it, an unmistakable aroma of lemons hitting her nose. Espresso Romano.

“Thank you. You didn’t have to bring me coffee, you know that, right?” despite that, she smiled at his sweet gesture.

“I know. But I wanted to do something for you. And your smile is the best reward I could ask for.” he shot her a smile, an insecure one, while his hand rose to push her hair behind her ear.

“Thank you, Ethan.” She took a sip from the cup, a look of pleasure and pure bliss on her face.

“I won’t keep you here any longer, have a nice day, I’ll catch you later” he squeezed her shoulder lightly, smiling, before leaving her to get to her patients.

The day was slowly going by. She had an unpleasant encounter with a patient and her mother, but managed to keep the situation under control, keeping her cool.

\------

Claire made her was towards the locker room in the evening, her shift finally over. All she wanted to do right now was to go home and sleep. Maybe grab some tea. She was also craving a chocolate chip cookie. Or ten.

Upon opening her locker, she knew something was wrong. Sure enough, in the middle there was a small paper bag with a note attached to it.

‘_Treat yourself sometimes.’_

Ethan. She knew it was him, the note gave that much away. For a second she wondered how did he get in it there, but then she remembered that she gave him a spare key in case he wanted to leave some files about Naveen in there for her.

She opened the bad and a soft smile made its way onto her lips. The bag was filled to the brim with chocolate chip cookies from her favorite bakery. She took Ethan there a couple of times.

Claire was touched at his gesture, flattered that he remembered what she liked, but then again, she really shouldn’t be that surprised. He was good at remembering things like that.

With a smile on her face she took one cookie out of the bag, hiding the rest of them in her purse, eating it while she went outside the hospital, completely unaware of a pair of eyes, watching her, proud of himself for making her smile again.


	3. III

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Caught redhanded, he continues to atone for his actions.

Throughout the next few days she would be getting more and more of small surprises. Little treats, for some people insignificant, but for her they meant a lot.

He was showing her he knew her, he cared and that he was trying, not pressuring her into anything.

Those simple moments quickly became her favorite parts of her day.

One time she caught him, walking into the locker room, just to find him turning around from her locker to leave.

“Got you, Doctor” she teased him softly, startling him.

“Claire! I… I didn’t hear you coming in.” he exclaimed, his cheeks becoming a little pink in a matter of seconds.

“I know what you’ve been doing. I just want to say… Thank you. knowingly or not, you make my days better with every single one of them.” She slowly approached him, taking small steps forward.

“You’re most certainly welcome, Claire.” His genuine smile, the one he saves only for her, resided his face.

“Riddle me this, though. Why treats, of all the things?” she finally stood in front of him, only centimeters between them.

“I know you, Claire. I want to prove myself, take care of you, but I also know that you need time. I get and respect that. What you should also know is that I find it harder to stay away from you as each day goes by. So, I had to find a way to be close to you but not impose myself upon you.”

“You’re sweet, you know that? So considerate of other’s feelings and needs. Makes you even more attractive than you already are.” She winked at him, making him blush an even darker shade of red.

“Okay, I hate to cut our conversation so short, but if I’m not in my office in five minutes, Zaid is going to have my head.”

“You’re scared of him? I thought that the great Ethan Ramsey wasn’t afraid of anything.”

“Oh no, I’m not afraid of him. It’s him who should be scared, because if he attacks, I’ll have to defend myself and god knows what will happen if I do.” He laughed and she joined him. “Although…” Ethan leaned in a little closer to her. “… I am afraid of a _few things_…” and with that he left, looking over his shoulder to throw her one last smile before disappearing from her view completely.

Claire noticed how comfortable they were getting around each other again. Their playful banter and flirting were back, only this time it was shameless and much more confident on his part, the fear of someone finding out, noticing their behavior, gone.

Shaking her head, she went to open her locker only to find a box with two cupcakes inside.

She was hungry, but not enough to eat two. That gave her the idea. Taking the box out of her locker she turned towards the new part of the hospital.

\------

Naveen was reading something written on a piece of paper when she entered, a box in one hand and two cups of tea in the other.

“Mind if I join you?” Claire smiled at him brightly, setting down one cup by his bed, placing cupcakes between them.

“Hi, Sunshine! How are you this fine evening?” Naveen smiled. He grew fond of the young woman, getting to know her made him feel like he had a granddaughter.

“Just fine, thank you. Would you like a cupcake? I won’t be able to eat two. Plus, it will go great with the tea you have in there.” she took one pastry out of the box and handed it to him, taking the other one for herself.

“That is really good! Where did you get those?” Naveen said, eating slowly the sweet treat.

“They’re from my favorite bakery. But it’s not me who got them.” She blushed, not sure if she wanted or was able to tell him the truth.

Fortunately for her, she didn’t have to. Her reaction was all he needed to figure out just _who_ gave her the cupcakes.

“So, what were you reading when I came in?” Claire looked over to the bedside table, a folded piece of paper laying there.

“You’ll like this. It’s one of your grandfather’s letters from the time _you_ were a baby. Would you like to read it?” he reached over and grabbed the letter for her, passing it to her. She finished her food and unfolded the paper, sitting more comfortably before she began reading.

‘_My dearest friend,_

_I hope life treats you well. How have you been since we’ve last spoken? _

_You asked me in one of your letters to tell you about my family and I’m about to do just that. _

_Eleonor, my wife, is the most kind, smart and beautiful woman this earth has ever held. Without her, I have no idea how I would have handled the dreads of everyday life._

_Lucy, my daughter, she’s my pride and joy, just like her mother, strong and smart, beautiful and full of life. She’s one of my fiercest fans, always there for me. She often asks me when she’ll see you again, you’re like an uncle to her._

_Then there is Clarissa… little Claire… she’s our little angel. My own little ray of sunshine, brightening up even the darkest days. She is still little, barely three, but her intelligence is startling. She understands so much. I know that one day she’s going to do great things, she’s going to help so many people._

_I hope to see you soon, Naveen. It’s been too long._

_With best wishes,_

_Charles’_

Claire was crying. She knew her grandfather valued his family above everything, but to hear his words in her head as she was reading the letter was a whole new experience.

“Thank, you Naveen. It means a lot to me that you let me read it. I appreciate it.”

“It’s nothing, really, Sunshine. I’m happy that I could let you have that moment.” He took her hand into his, squeezing it lightly.

That was the precise moment Ethan walked into the room. He didn’t expect to see Claire there, nor did he expect to see her crying her eyes out.

“Claire, are you okay? What happened?” walking over to her side, searching for her eyes, for any sign of a cause of her distress. He found none.

“I’m fine, I just read one of my granddad’s letters and… got a little emotional, that’s all.” His hand landed hesitantly on her shoulder, testing the waters. She put her hand on his, their fingers lacing together softly. “Really, I’m fine. You don’t have to worry about me.”

“I always worry about you. You should know that by now.” he said with a smile, but she knew he was serious. Ethan looked around the room, noticing two empty cups where tea used to be. “You had a tea party without me? You wound me!” he laughed, and both Naveen and Claire laughed along, a warm atmosphere of home and familiarity in the air.

“Oh, by the way, Ethan?” Naveen turned towards the young man. “Great cupcakes.” He teased, making the attending blush, looking away from both of them as the remaining two silently bumped their fists together, grinning at one another.

\-----

Few days went by, their conversations more and more frequent. Naveen seemed to notice the change in their dynamics too, greeting them both with a wide grin, throwing suggestive glances between them.

Her shift was over, she left Naveen’s room, letting him have some book time and sleep. Upon entering the locker room, that she expected to be empty by now, she saw a familiar figure, leaning on her locker, eyes closed, a brown paper bag in hand.

“Ethan! What are you doing here?” she was genuinely surprised to see him there, mostly because she saw him leaving the hospital… ah, that would seem to be right. He must have left to pick up her bag of cookies from the bakery.

“Waiting for you. Normally I would just leave it in your locker, but today… I have something to ask you.” he shuffled from one leg to another, clearly uncomfortable and nervous.

“Well, what is it? I’ve never seen you that worked up before. Is something wrong?” she took a few steps in his direction, concern painted on her features.

“I know I said I didn’t want to impose myself upon you, and I know I said I respect your boundaries, but… I’d like to take you out. On a date, that is. I want to do it right this time. I completely understand if you think it’s too soon, but I saw this poster of the play in the theatre nearby and immediately thought of you and…”

“I’d love to go. When is it?” she interrupted him, deciding to end his misery.

“… and I totally get that you may never… wait, what? Did you say yes?!” he stopped his rambling, shocked, eyes wide with surprise.

“Yes, I did. I’d love to go with you. Tell me, when is it?” Claire smiled at his flustered face, grinning softly when a huge smile broke out on his features.

“It’s this Friday, 7 PM. And hour after your shift ends. I could drive us there. How does that sound?”

“Perfect. I can’t wait. And once again, thank you for the treats.” She squeezed his arm before going to change.

\------

Friday arrived much sooner than she thought it would and she was glad it did. She wasn’t sure she would be able to wait any longer.

What was dragging out, was her shift that day. It seemed as though it would never end.

When it finally did end, she made her way towards the locker room, changing into a floor length purple dress with a v-shaped neckline, a pair of high heels and letting her hair down from her ponytail.

Claire made her way towards the front entrance, earning a few stares and words of approval along the way. She wasn’t surprised, given the fact that not everyday someone at the hospital dressed like this.

What she didn’t expect was the many gasps she heard from behind her. Turning around, she found the cause of this behavior of everyone else.

_Ethan Ramsey._

_Ethan Ramsey in a tux._

_Ethan Ramsey in a tux, holding a bouquet of red roses in his hands._

_Looking right at her._

Oh boy, she was in for a night full of surprises, for sure.


	4. IV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A night in the theatre brings them together.

He approached her slowly, standing in front of her, amazement in his eyes.

“These are for you.” he handed her the flowers, eyes never leaving her face.

“They’re lovely. Thank you.”

“You look… ravishing. So beautiful it’s unreal…” Ethan very rarely had trouble with voicing his opinion, but one look at her was enough for him to struggle with finding words to describe her.

“You don’t look too bad yourself.” Claire laughed, her cheeks reddened under his intense stare.

“Claire.” He extended his arm, inviting her to lace her hand through his.

“Ethan.” She replied with a smile, linking their arms and letting him guide her out of the hospital.

They made their way towards his car, not caring about the stares people were giving them. Ethan opened her door for her, helping her with the back of her dress and then getting in himself.

The car ride was quiet. So unlike them, but it felt like a first date, both nervous and unsure of what to do.

Ethan’s hands ached. He longed to take her in his arms and never let her go, but he knows he cannot do that. It’s to soon, for both of them. He opted for something simpler and instead brushed his fingers against hers, not saying a word.

Theatre was slowly getting more and more crowded; people were coming in and making their way towards their places. It was really easy to get lost. For that, and only that reason, or so he told himself, Ethan placed his hand on the small of her back softy, tentatively, careful not to cross the line. He felt her body go stiff for a second, not knowing who’s touch she felt, but as soon as she realized it was him, she relaxed a bit.

He led her to their seats, letting her go first.

Sitting down, Claire had the chance to look around and take in her surroundings.

The stage was beautiful, curtain was made out of a red, rich material, descending gracefully from the ceiling. The sides were made of wood, golden elements adorning them in a few places, intricate flowers and leaves climbing up the columns.

Looking up she could see the ceiling, and it was unlike anything she’s ever seen before. Paintings were places all over it, depicting various scenes from classical pieces, some of which she recognized, some of which were new to her, unknown, but exciting, spiking her interest.

Ethan was looking at her, mesmerized. The attention she paid to even the smallest details in every field of her life, beginning with her job and ending with her surroundings in the outside world, was admirable and so attractive to him.

He watches as her eyes followed the artwork up above them, sparkling with joy and curiosity.

He took her hand in his softly, extending her index finger, before guiding it upwards, focusing her attention on one of the paintings.

“That’s from ‘_Tristan and Isolde’_. It’s from the scene in the woods, while being on the run…”

“… they were living in the woods and he decided to return her to the King, not wanting to expose her to the life of unknown future. I know. I read it.” she smiled at his surprised face.

“You read classical literature? I must say, I’m impressed.” Her hand was still in the air, his fingers slid down her arm, reaching her elbow, tickling the skin there, goosebumps rising.

“I’m full of surprises.”

“I am aware. You don’t have to prove that.”

“Oh, I know.” She leaned in, teasing him. “But I’m going to do it anyway.” She whispered, then leaned back, leaving him flustered and confused.

“You’re something else, you really are.”

“What is new, right?” they both laughed.

\-----

The lights died down, curtain went up and the show began.

Ethan was nervous, not knowing if she’d like the play he chose, but the look of pure happiness and excitement on her face said it all.

He chose the perfect one.

Claire was immersed into the plot, the actors playing, music, costumes, the look of the stage, it all stunned her. It was like a dream come true; all she’s ever wanted to see on stage was right before her eyes.

The more time passed the more the plot thickened, characters making critical choices, going unknowingly towards their destiny, which was still unclear.

A young man made his way to the center of the stage, speaking loudly and clearly about his feelings and thoughts on life, love and society. Unknown to him, another man was creeping up on him, a knife raised.

In the last moments of his life he saw his one, true love, standing before him, bathed in white light, dead and waiting for him on the other side.

Claire, without thinking about it, reached for Ethan’s hand, lacing their fingers, squeezing them from time to time. His pulse quickened every time she did that, looking at her instead of at the stage.

The music reached its peak as the man crossed the stage to take his wife by her hand, letting himself go, peacefully, happy to be reunited at last. The whole stage illuminated by white light, smoke twirling softly by the floor.

Last notes could be heard and then it was dark.

The lights came back on a few seconds later, the ensemble came onto the stage to take their bows.

Claire stood up, clapping in a polite and full of emotions manner, a ‘_thank you_’ to the cast, while Ethan stood by her, clapping along, but his eyes were once more on Claire and Claire only.

That woman was truly amazing, a picture of pure perfection, polite and well-behaved… at least most of the time, and she shared his interests, appreciating art in all its shapes and forms, just like him.

\-----

A while later they went outside, her shawl not covering up enough of her bare arms and back to provide any form of protection against the cold air of the night.

Ethan noticed, as if he could not notice anything that concerned her. He took his coat off, wrapping it around her shoulders, his scent taking over her senses, making her mind go blank for a second.

“Thank you.” she smiled, wrapping herself in it even tighter, hiding her nose in the soft material, taking a deep breath.

There was something about his scent, something so distinctly his, a mixture of a strong, masculine scent and something soft, comforting, a perfect match for his persona.

“So, what do we do now? You have something planned, don’t you?” she asked, despite the fact that she already knew the answer.

“You know I do. That is, only if you want to, but I’d like to take you to my favorite restaurant.” He blushed, another thing he didn’t do often, only with her, because only she could make him feel such a whirlwind of emotions.

“Lead the way.”

\------

Claire was slowly starting to realize that he was holding himself back, unable to make any decision on his own, because he gave up all control to her. That was something new, he _loved_ his control, it made him feel safe and confident.

By letting her take the reins, giving up his power to her, he was making himself vulnerable. Ethan was letting her take control, so she could lead them through their relationship at her own pace, taking as much time as she needed.

Deciding on using a little of that power, she reached out to lock their fingers together, their hands hanging between them.

Neither said a word, letting their actions speak for them, louder than any words ever could.


	5. V

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Family meetings and answers to burning questions.

When Ethan said he wanted to take her to his favorite restaurant, she immediately thought about a very fancy place, where lobster and caviar were a common thing.

To her surprise, he led them towards a small diner in the quiet part of the otherwise loud street, a warm ray of light falling through the window from the inside onto the street.

He opened the door for her, walking in behind her before turning to the young woman by the entrance.

“Ethan! Oh, how long have I not seen you! How are you?” she exclaimed, maybe a little too loud, throwing herself at him, his arms hugging her briefly.

“I’m good, Soph. Claire, this is Sophie, my sister. Soph, this is Claire, my…”

“Girlfriend?! Oh my god, Mom! He finally brought someone here! Come, look!” Sophie shouted, bringing Claire in for a tight hug, squeezing all the air from her lungs.

“She’s not my…” Ethan started explaining, looking extremally uncomfortable, moving his eyes to Claire, an apology at the tip of his tongue, but she was smiling, hugging his sister, not at all bothered by the title she was given.

“Ethan, honey! I was beginning to think you wanted nothing to do with us!” a woman came from behind one of the tables, dressed elegantly, a bright smile on her face.

“Hi, Mom. I didn’t know you’d be here today.” Ethan let her hug him, a little longer than he would have liked, then let her go, shifting closer to Claire.

“I’m Louise, mother of this one here. It’s lovely to meet you.”

“I’m Claire, it’s nice to meet you too, Mrs. Ramsey.” She smiled, looking between the three members of the Ramsey family.

The resemblance was obvious, no one could deny they were related. The same hair, same nose, same mouth.

What she did notice, though, was the fact, that the two women had dark, brown eyes, while Ethan’s were blue, like the sky on a sunny day.

Ethan turned towards Claire, smiling fondly at her with a glint in his eyes.

“The restaurant belongs to Sophie. They serve the best lasagna I’ve ever eaten, my mother’s recipe.”

“Well, in that case, it would be a crime not to eat it, right?” her eyes moved away from his for a short moment, looking at Sophie, before returning to Ethan.

He extended his arm towards one of the tables by the wall, letting her go first, moving her chair for her and then sitting down himself.

“Wine?”

“Please.”

“Give me a minute.” He stood up again, looking at her briefly with a smirk, before making his way towards the bar.

\------

The second he turned away from her, his mother took his place, a warm smile adorning her face.

“You have no idea how long I’ve waited for him to bring someone to meet us. After that disaster of a relationship with Harper he closed himself off. We all though he would be alone for the rest of his life. I’m happy he found you, especially since you are basically the woman of his dreams.”

“I’m sorry, could you possibly repeat that?” she was floored to say the least. Louise leaned in, looking up to see if Ethan was still preoccupied with the bartender, before speaking.

“When he was little, he had a dream. So vivid he swore it could have been real, a vision of some kind. He said he saw a girl, a girl he would one day marry.”

“How old was he?” Claire laughed a little, a picture of a small Ethan running through her mind.

“He was ten. But what was interesting, he described her. He described… well, _you_. Red hair, green eyes and a bright, beautiful smile.”

“I… I’m not sure what to say…” she laughed, stunned beyond words.

They talked some more, Louise revealing a few more stories from Ethan’s childhood. How he got his first dog and slept with him in his bed for months, because he refused to let his furry friend sleep outside, or how he tried to bake cookies and almost set the house on fire.

“Oh, hell no; no, no, no. what are you telling her?” Ethan finally noticed his mother talking to Claire, striding towards them, standing between the two women.

“Just a few stories from your childhood, don’t worry.” Claire smiled, teasing him a little.

“Mom, you’re ruining my reputation as a strict doctor.”

“Oh, please, you’re saying as though I’ve ever seen you that way.”

Now Claire was laughing, his mother joined her and soon so did Ethan, attempting to scold her and failing, his gaze softening almost immediately.

“I’ll let you two enjoy your meal. And, Claire?” she turned towards the young woman. “Make sure he visits us more often, will you?” and with that she walked away, leaving a flustered and embarrassed Ethan and an amused Claire.

“I’m sorry about her.”

“I don’t mind, she’s really nice, I’m happy you took me here, even though you didn’t exactly plan on us meeting today.”

She notices he did bring wine along with him, two glasses of dark, red liquid. He passed her one, taking the other for himself, before raising it to make a toast.

“To new beginnings.”

“To new beginnings.”

They clinked their glasses, taking a sip. The wine had a soft undertone, coating the roof of her mouth pleasantly.

Their food arrived shortly after; two plates of steaming pasta placed before them.

Claire took a bite, a taste from heaven taking her taste buds hostage. She closed her eyes, licking her lips in pleasure. Her head turned towards the front door.

“Soph, this is the best thing I’ve ever eaten!”

“That’s why Ethan used to eat it all the time as a kid!” she shouted back, clearly enjoying torturing her brother.

They talked a little, mostly focusing on their meal. They finished, and Ethan suggested ending the night, but his mother wouldn’t hear a word of it.

“Son, if you really think I will let Claire out of here without dessert, I will be very disappointed. And here I was, thinking I raised you better than that. You know that one of the shortest ways to woman’s heart is through sweets.”

“I can assure, Mrs. Ramsey, that Ethan is well aware of it.” Claire smiled, turning to look at him, a blush once again on his cheeks.

“Very well. Claire, you have to try my orange and chocolate cake, it’s exquisite.”

“You like chocolate, Mrs. Ramsey?”

“Yes, why? And please, Louise is fine.” Her smile made Claire feel warmth spreading inside her chest.

“No reason, Louise.” With that she snuck a look at Ethan, a suggestive smirk on her lips.

Another hour passed before they could begin preparing to leave.

Ethan held his coat out for her again, not taking ‘no’ for an answer.

Sophie came over, hugging her brother and crushing Claire in a bear hug. They exchanged their phone numbers, planning a shopping trip in near future.

Louise pulled her son closer, whispering something in his ear. he nodded firmly, a soft smile on his lips.

“I won’t. Wouldn’t dream of it.”

Then, with a satisfied look on her face, she moved to Claire, hugging her tightly.

“It was a pleasure meeting you, dear. Come by sometime, and bring this stubborn one with you, okay?” she nodded her head towards her son.

“It was great getting to meet you both. I’ll make sure he visits you more.” She said, throwing Ethan a determined look, challenging him to disagree with her. He raised his hands in mock surrender, making everyone laugh.

They said their goodbyes and left.

Walking back to his car felt different. Something shifted between them, neither of them sure what it was, but they both felt it was good. It was _right_.

They were sitting in his car, a soft ballad in the background.

“Claire?”

“Yes, Ethan?”

“Can I ask you a question?”

“You just did. Twice.” She smirked, satisfied with herself.

“Don’t play coy with me now. I am serious.” His words expressed the value of what he was trying to say, but he did smile, cutting the edge off of his previous sentence.

“Sure. Ask away.”

“Why didn’t you correct my family about us dating?”

“Ah…. Here it is. I was wondering when you’ll get around to ask that.”

“So? Why didn’t you?”

“They were so happy, I didn’t want to burst their bubble.” His face fell at her words. That’s not the answer he expected. That’s not the answer he wanted. “And, quite frankly, I didn’t mind…” she added, softer and more quiet this time round.

“Do you…”

“I don’t know. Maybe it’s too soon. We’ll see where it takes us. How about that?”

“Perfect.”

“So, now I have a thing to say,”

“Go ahead.”

“That was some entrance you did back there at the hospital.” She looked towards the back of his car, a bouquet of roses sitting still, infusing the air with their sweet aroma. “Didn’t you… want to keep it a secret?”

“I already told you, Claire. I’m done with hiding my emotions and feelings. I tried it once and I almost lost you. Don’t know about you, but I’m not willing to risk doing that again.”

“We can’t risk you losing the girl of your dreams, now, can we?” she said that casually, but she was looking at him, waiting for her words to make their impact.

“What? How… Mom.”

“She’s a sneaky one, huh?”

“I’m sorry, you shouldn’t…”

“What exactly are you apologizing for, Ethan?”

“I’m sorry you didn’t find it out from me, she was faster. You… look _exactly_ like the woman from my dreams, your personality is beautiful, I couldn’t ask for a better person to cross my path. I don’t regret meeting you, nor am I apologizing for it.”

“I am honored to be someone like this for you.” she reached over, holding his free hand in his softly.

He parked his car outside her apartment building and got out, helping her and then handing her the bouquet.

“Thank you for an amazing evening and for the flowers.”

“The pleasure’s all mine, Claire. Believe me, there is nothing I would rather be doing right now than spending my time with you.”

Their hands met one last time in a delicate display of affection.

She began taking his coat off, when he stopped her.

“Keep it. At least until you can give it back, when you’ll have your chance.” Something about her in his clothes made his heart skip a beat.

She was about to start saying her goodbyes when she remembered one little detail that she couldn’t seem to get out of her head.

“Ethan? One more thing. When we were leaving, your mother whispered something to you.” they both fell silent, his face twisting in some sort of embarrassment. “You don’t have to tell me. Sorry, I shouldn’t have a…”

“She told me to hold on to you tight. To never let you go.” He admitted quietly.

“Oh…” she then remembered what his answer was and her heart began beating faster, her cheeks getting hot, a furiously red blush creeping onto her face. “Thank you… for everything.”

Claire leaned in slowly, pressing a sweet kiss to his cheek.

“Goodnight, Ethan.” A whisper to his ear, a ghost of her lips against his skin. He felt it all, right before she took a step back, smiling softly at him.

“Goodnight, Claire.” He squeezed her hand one last time before letting her go, walking her towards the door with his eyes.

When he could no longer see her, he got into his car, trying to process what just happened.

His head fell forward, resting on the steering wheel. He took a deep breath to steady himself.

That was easily, without the doubt, the best date of his life. And it was all because of _her_.

Ethan shook his head and, with a knowing smile, drove off.


	6. VI

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With newfound determination, they continue to dance around each other.

It seemed as though Ethan had newfound confidence and determination since their date. He was sure that she was the one for him. His family loved her, took her in as their own and surrounded her with care.

He couldn’t get her kiss out of his mind. He used to think that nothing was able to stick in his mind like that, that nothing was able to make his mind freeze with just a mere memory of it.

Yet here he was, sitting by his kitchen table, cup of coffee in his hand and his gaze absent. His mind was elsewhere.

_With her_.

He was determined to get her back, to get her trust back. And he was ready to do whatever it took to be by her side again.

Buying her sweets was one of his brightest ideas to date, but he felt like that wasn’t enough anymore. He also remembered one late night, where they were hunched over the files in front of him and there was a bouquet of field flowers from one of his young patients. She mused how she loved tulips, of all colors, especially the unusual ones, like purple and blue and pink ones.

He had a special place in his mind for all things concerning her. A big one at that. Everything, from her favorite food and flowers to her favorite route for long walks in the evening, when she needed to clear her head. It was all in there, and those pieces of information some of his most priced possessions. And he was not afraid to put that into good use.

And so, the very next morning, when Claire opened her locker, expecting the usual bag with treats from Ethan. What she didn’t expect was to find a small bundle of purple tulips next to it, with a small note next to it.

_Beautiful and unique flowers, for a beautiful and unique woman._

_Thank you for giving me a chance_

_-E_

It still amazed her how easy it was for her to smile when she thought about him. The corners of her lips went up involuntarily, no matter how hard she tried to control it, and her heart hammered in her chest, her cheeks burned with a blush.

Feeling a little playful, she took one of the flowers from the bouquet and putting it in the breast pocket of her lab coat, the color of the petals standing out against the crisp, white background.

She took out the treats and left the rest of the flowers in her locker, so they don’t get damaged or lost, before walking out of the locker room and get to her rounds.

Her friends were already there when she arrived, eating her cookie, piece by piece.

“What you got there, Claire?” Elijah called out, smiling widely at her.

“The reason for my existence right now.” she said as she popped another part into her mouth.

“Care to share?” Jackie stood next to her now, Sienna on the other side.

“Hell no. This is my cookie. Get your own.” She teased them, grinning widely at her friends, hugging her hands with the sweet in it closer to her body.

Ethan emerged from behind the corner and groaned in his head. The swarm of interns always made him irritated. But then his eyes caught a glimpse of red.

Claire was standing among her friends, eating the cookie he got for her with a happy smile on her face. He was glad she enjoyed them just as much as he enjoyed getting those for her.

“Alright, simmer down, everyone and let’s get it over with. Today you are…” his voice caught in his throat when his eyes fell on Claire again, now fully turned towards him. What caught his eye was the speck of purple on her coat.

_A purple tulip_.

She saw him looking and smirked at him, clearly pleased with herself.

Ines, who was by his side, noticed his lack of response to her calling him, so she took over.

Meanwhile, Ethan and Clare were playing the staring game, shamelessly flirting with their eyes, not bothering to cover up their actions.

The other interns disappeared, leaving them alone. Subconsciously, they were stepping closer to each other, until they were centimeters away.

“I take it you liked the flowers?” he said quietly, his voice low.

“I see you paid attention to my favorite flowers.” She teased him, running her hands up and down his palm.

“I always pay attention to you.” he lowered his head, inching closer to her. She looked up, their lips almost touching.

“Thank you for the flowers, Ethan.” Smiling at him sweetly, she sidestepped him and went to her patients, smirking to herself.

That left him in the middle of the hall, flustered and confused.

_That teasing woman._

He snapped out of it and went back to his duties.

\------

By the end of the day he went to visit Naveen and, no surprise, Claire was already there, sitting and laughing with his mentor, a flower in her hand, twirling it softly.

Ethan felt his heart melt at the sight of her treating his gift for her with such care and tenderness. 

Naveen looked up and saw him looking at the young woman next to him, his eyes tender and full of adoration.

“Ethan! How nice of you to finally join us! Come, sit here.” He pointed towards the place on the bed, opposite Claire. Ethan took a few steps and took a seat, placing one of his hands on the bed for balance.

They talked about Naveen’s results, what they meant and what they should do next.

Ethan was in the middle of explaining the new treatment he found during doing his research, when he felt the softest touch against the tips of his fingers.

He saw, in the corner of his eye, Claire’s fingers, interlacing with his. His heartbeat sped up, a furious blush took over his features and he lost the track of what he was supposed to say, words flying out of his mind.

Claire, meanwhile, was looking at Naveen with the most satisfied and smug expression he’s ever seen on her face.

She was doing this on purpose. She was teasing him, pushing his buttons, trying to provoke a reaction.

What is more, she succeeded.

“Okay, I need to go see if the lab results for my patient are ready. Have a nice evening, Naveen. Ethan.” She nodded at him, her eyes smiling.

“It’s always a pleasure to see you, Sunshine.” Naveen replied, waving at her.

Ethan couldn’t take his eyes off her, the flower somehow, miraculously in her hair, right behind her ear.

When she was gone, and Ethan was still staring at the place she was standing in, just mere seconds ago, a wide grin on his face accompanied by a lovestruck glint in his eyes, Naveen let out a loud, hearty laugh. In fact, he was laughing so hard, he had to grab his stomach form the pain and the tears were streaming down his cheeks.

This grabbed his attention, a confused look on his face.

“What is it? Is something wrong?” concern overshadowed his happy state.

“Oh, nothing, everything is absolutely fine. Perfect, even. I’m relieved actually.”

“Relieved? Why?”

“Because you found it in yourself to fight for her. You left behind your ridiculous thoughts and nonexistent and irrelevant barriers and took the steering wheel of your life.”

“Well, aren’t you a poet, Naveen.” He mocked, but the tips of his ears reddened slightly.

“She really is special, isn’t she?” Ethan opened his mouth to protest, but his mentor raised his hand, stopping him from doing do. “Don’t deny it. I saw it. you look at her as though she is the reason the sun raises in the morning and there are stars and moon in the sky at night. If only you could have seen your face, just a few minutes ago. You were _mesmerized_. The happiest I’ve ever seen you, though that is probably going to change very soon, if things keep on going in the same direction as they are now.” Naveen winked at the young attending, clearly enjoying making his friend flustered.

Ethan groaned, leaning over to hide his embarrassment in his hands.

“You like torturing me, don’t you?”

“It’s nothing bad or wrong, Ethan. You both deserve to be happy. Don’t waste the chance she gave you. Take it with both hands and hold onto it. _Hold onto her._”

“Funny, my own mother told me the very same thing.”

“You know, she is a very intelligent woman. I wouldn’t expect anything else from her. Now, go. Maybe you’ll catch her before she leaves.”

He bid him goodbye and left, racing to the locker room, hoping she hasn’t left yet, but the room was empty, the lights were turned off.

Crestfallen, he made his way towards his office, head in the clouds, not registering that someone was waiting for him by his office.

“What got you so worked up, Doctor?” Claire’s voice cut through the thick curtain of his thoughts.

“I though you already left…” he replied, though his voice trailed off when he saw her, took in her appearance.

She was in a black shirt with purple flowers sewn onto it, white jeans, elongating her legs, giving the optical illusion. Her hair was down, and she was holding a bouquet he left for her in the morning.

“I didn’t. I have a small thing that I need to talk over with you.” a mischievous glint appeared in her eye as she let her eyes explore his face.

“Oh… um, please, come in.” he choked on his words, fumbling with his keys to open the door for her.

Once they were inside and assured that no one would interrupt them, he turned to her, watching how light reflected in her hair. She had her back to him, waiting for him to make the first move. The flowers were placed safely on his desk.

Her teeth sunk into her lip delicately in anticipation of what was to come.

She felt the heat of his body right behind her, his breath on her neck, heavy with excitement, getting faster and faster with each and every second that he got to be close to her.

Her skin burned when his fingers trailed up and down her arm, gently, delicately and definitely with purpose. A shiver rad down her spine, goosebumps formed on her skin and her pulse got somehow even faster, much faster than she ever thought was possible. He leaned in close and whispered into her ear.

“What did you want us to talk about?” his voice was so smooth and deep and so attractive, that she almost forgot her reasons to take things slow, they were lost and nowhere to be found in that moment.

She turned around to face him, still biting into the flesh of her lips, her eyes clouded, teasing him.

Claire raised her hand, running the tip of her index finger down his chest slowly, looking straight into his eyes all the time.

“Well, I thought that since our last date was so successful, now would be the good time for _me_ to take _you_ somewhere.”

“Claire, it’s me who screwed up. I’m the one who is supposed to take you places, not the other way around.”

“Here is where you’re wrong. That’s not how relationships work, Ethan. It’s supposed to be an equal work and dedication, from both sides. So, stop complaining, I’m taking you out on a date. End of discussion.” She smiled at him, but her eyes were serious, almost as if she was challenging him to disagree.

Ethan shook his head as a hearty chuckle escaped his lips. He raised his hands in mock surrender.

“I surrender. When are we going? And _where_ are you taking me? Should I be scared?”

“I don’t know if you should be scared or not. We’ll see about that. Anyway, we’re going on our next day off, which is in three days. I’ll remind you the day before, but wear something comfortable. And I mean _comfortable_.” She stepped closer to him, grinning from ear to ear.

“Okay… so, where are we going?”

“The amusement park.”

“Aren’t we a little too old for those?”

“You’re never too old to have fun, Dr. Ramsey. So, do you accept the challenge?” she leaned forward, her lips almost touching his.

“Yes…” he whispered, the anticipation killing him. He longed to kiss her, to feel her lips on his once again.

But she had other plans.

Upon hearing his reply, she leaned back, and with a smug and teasing grin she looked at his flustered face.

“Great! I’ll see you around, Dr. Ramsey.” She pecked his cheek softly before taking her flowers and running out of his office, laughing.

Again. She did that again. She teased him and he fell for it. He laughed, but there was some uneasiness deep inside of him.

_What has he gotten himself into?_


	7. VII

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In amusement park, not only the rides are rising to its heights.

By the time their day off came around, Claire managed to change their date destination three times. She was so nervous, something about him made her heart beat faster.

She wanted him to let loose a little, he seemed stressed lately and she wouldn’t have that.

Settling for a big theme park by the water, she decided against planning their activities. They would be spontaneous, see where the day would take them.

When the day arrived, she pulled on a pair of black jeans and a soft, lavender shirt, before going to his place.

She didn’t warn him when or where they would meet, so she wouldn’t be all that surprised if he was still not ready.

She entered his apartment building, aiming her steps towards his door. Knocking on it, she heard Jenner barking and soft footsteps coming towards her.

The door flew open and there was Ethan, bare chest, pants hanging low on his hips, hair disheveled and sticking out in every direction, eyes clouded with sleep but upon seeing her, they flashed with excitement and some sort of panic. She put her hand on her hip before speaking.

“Is that the way you always greet people by the door? Not that I’m complaining. Although…” she came a step closer to him, lowering her voice slightly. “… I’d prefer you kept those kinds of views _only _

He cleared his throat, trying and failing to pull himself together.

“I _may_ have overslept. Besides, you didn’t tell me when and where we were supposed to meet. Had I known you would come here to honor me with your presence, I’d make sure to be ready for you.”

An innuendo has fallen from his mouth before he realized what he was saying. Claire burst out laughing, doubling over, while he flushed with embarrassment.

“Oh, _wow,_ Dr. Ramsey, that was _smooth_. I’m impressed.”

“Um, please, take a seat on the couch, I’ll go get ready.” He led her to the living room before turning around, towards his bedroom. Right before he went in, he turned back to her.

“Claire?”

“Yes?”

“You _know_ those views are _only for you.”_ he smiled at her before disappearing behind the door, hearing a soft “I sure hope so.” coming from the living room.

\-----

About fifteen minutes later he emerged from the room again, this time dressed, but he still looked good. It was an unknown mystery to her, how could one man be so handsome and look good in everything he put on?

She asked him to dress comfortably, and he delivered. A pair of jeans and a grey sweater, clinging tightly to his body. Her eyes shamelessly dragged over his body.

“You like what you see?” he smirked at her, and to his surprise, she calmly looked up to meet his eyes, not a hint of embarrassment on her face.

“Very much. Now, are you ready?”

“I am. Though I’m not sure what am I supposed to be ready for.”

“I don’t either. We’ll see what happens. You want to go by car or by subway?”

“If you are seriously asking that question, then you don’t know me at all, Claire.”

“I’m joking, I do know you would never choose a subway if you had other choice. Come on, let’s go.”

\-----

The weather was quite nice that day. The sun was coming out and going behind the clouds every now and then, a soft, warm breeze was blowing her hair away from her face.

Ethan was amused at the place she picked, but seeing her so happy, he relented and let her drag him inside. His fingers searched for hers, touching softly at first, then more confidently, before intertwining them, squeezing them lightly. She squeezed back, smiling at him sweetly.

The first few hours they spent walking around, sightseeing. She even managed to drag him onto some of the kids rides, like the teacup one, where they were sipping very fast. He didn’t really mind, but seeing her laugh like that made him feel good about himself.

There was a small band playing in the middle of the park, people were singing and dancing, or standing on the side and watching.

Claire wanted to go, see what the commotion was about, so Ethan took her hand again and they went there together. When she realized what was happening, she let out a happy sound and let go of his hand, running towards the singing crowd, joining in.

It was a song from one of her favorite musicals, she would be damned if she didn’t join in.

Ethan didn’t know that she liked singing or dancing. Let alone, that she could sing and dance _like that_.

Her movements seemed to hypnotize him, he was unable to look away from her moving form. The way she danced made him want to join her, and before he could think twice about his decision, his legs were already moving towards her, resuming his hold on her hand and pulling her in to him, their bodies collided as they began dancing to the tune. She sang along, her voice able to reach even the highest of notes.

She was surprised to see him there, dancing with her, clearly out of his comfort zone, but one look into his eyes and she knew why. He was willing to do anything for her, even if it was something as trivial as dancing.

The song came to its end and he bowed to her playfully, maintaining his eye contact with her. She laughed and bowed back at him elegantly, laughing cheerfully. Snaking his arm around her waist, they made their way away from the crowd to continue their day.

Claire said suddenly that she has an amazing idea. She shot forward without any warning and he lost his hold on her for a second, only to catch her a while later, her head turned up high, looking with a mischievous smile on her face at something above them.

His eyes followed hers, and his heart stopped.

_A roller coaster._

_That’s three floors high._

_Hell no._

He might have a fear of heights that he never told her about. And he might be terrified of roller coasters ever since his cousin took him on one when he was a kid and they stopped midair, got stuck in there for three hours before they were rescued.

There were only a few things he was afraid of. And this was one of them.

Looking over at Claire, he realized that he’d have to get this over with. There was no way he was going to tell her he was afraid. And there was no way he was going to destroy her day because he was too scared to go there with her. So he said nothing.

While standing in the line, his hold on her waist was strong, trying to ground himself any way he could, and she happened to be the closest and the most effective way to do so.

Once they were seated and strapped in, he reached for her hand again, smiling at her, hoping to disguise his fear.

The beginning of the ride wasn’t that bad. He was pretty calm, feeling her body next to his certainly helped a lot.

But as the time went on, and the ride gained speed, he started panicking. His breathing got labored, his hands started trembling and he could feel the tears gathering in his eyes.

He tried to play the brave card but lost that battle pretty quickly. He needed it to stop. Or to hide. Or both.

He reached over for Claire and hid his face in the crook of her neck, breathing in the scent of her perfume and shampoo. In and out, he tried synchronizing his breathing with hers. And for the time being, that would have to be enough.

She wrapped one arm around him, stroking his back softly, soothingly, not sure what was happening, but offering him all the support she could give him at the moment.

Once they were back on the ground and out of their seats, he fell into her arms, all energy that he had was gone. She wrapped her arms around him, pulling him as close to her as she could, and led them to the bench a few meters away.

He sat down and leaned forward, hiding his face in his hands. She ran her hand through his hair softly.

“Stay here, I’ll be right back.”

Claire made her way to the booth that stored the photos of people on the rides, looking for their photo. And sure enough, there it was. She expected it to be the funniest photo for some people, but she couldn’t have imagined a photo carrying more emotions than this one.

His face was buried in her neck, her arm around him, hugging him closely, her face a picture of protectiveness.

She decided to buy two, an idea forming in her head.

When Claire came back to Ethan, he was already a lot calmer than when she left him.

“Okay. I have a proposition. How about… we ditch this place and go for a walk along the beach?”

“I’m going to take you up on that offer. Lead the way.” He smiled at her uncertainly, a hint of embarrassment in his voice.

She grabbed his hand tightly and pulled him with her, away from the roller coaster.

\------

The breeze on the beach was a little stronger than among the buildings, as it was closer to the water and there was nothing in its way.

She wrapped his arm around her shoulder, searching for heat, letting his scent fall over her senses. From the position she was in she had no way of seeing his face, that lit up with happiness when she hugged herself against him. It made his heart swell with relief and admiration for her, when he was seeing her letting herself be vulnerable around him.

They walked for a good hour, it was getting late, and the sun was beginning to set.

He was about to propose driving her home, when she pulled him towards the patch of grass, sitting down and yanking him down, making him sit next to her. He complied, throwing his arms around her, hugging her to him, so she wasn’t cold. Her head fit into the crook oh his neck perfectly.

The sun set and the sky got dark, the stars were beginning to become visible. She laid back, her eyes gazing at the big patch of navy above them.

He looked at her face, peaceful and calm. He laid back too, took her into his arms again and she placed her head on his chest, breathing easily and steadily.

“Why didn’t you tell me you didn’t want to go on that ride? You know I wouldn’t make you.” she whispered suddenly, not changing their position.

“I didn’t want to disappoint you.”

“I wouldn’t have been disappointed. Besides, I think there is still something you’re not telling me.”

“Excellent observation, Dr. Herondale. The truth is, I have a fear of heights and… when I was young, my cousin dragged me to one of those, and we got stuck in the air for three hours. I swore to never do that again.”

“Oh, why didn’t you tell me sooner?”

“I was embarrassed, Claire. I still am. It’s my weak side, I don’t normally show it off. To anyone.”

“I’m glad you did to me. Thank you.” she turned her head towards him.

Their eyes met, their lips only centimeters apart. He leaned forward, hoping, begging for it to be the moment he was waiting for, but she had, yet again, leaned back.

“Why won’t you kiss me?” he whispered, a pained expression on his face, his voice breaking.

She could practically see the gears in his head working, all the bad thoughts and scenarios playing out in front of his eyes.

Claire placed her hands on his cheeks and made him look at her.

“I want to take things slow. I don’t want to rush. I want to cherish this thing we have. Can you wait a little longer for me?” she replied, her voice small and quiet.

All he thoughts, all his theories about how she didn’t want him, how he messed up beyond repair, it all was gone the second her words left her mouth. He kissed her forehead tenderly before hugging her tightly to his chest, her head under his chin.

“I’ll wait for the whole eternity if that’s what it takes.” He whispered into her ear, and they stared up into the night sky, sprinkled with endless light spots.


	8. VIII

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jealousy is a good look on him.

Each and every day that passed made her more and more sure that Ethan really wanted them to try. It wasn’t about the gifts, she would never base anything on the material stuff, she wasn’t that kind of a person, but the fact that he listened to her and remembered what she liked made her heart beat faster.

It was almost a week after their second date. And while she still thought that it was a disaster to some degree, he made it a duty of his to reassure her that he really enjoyed himself, because no matter where they were, or what they were doing, as long as he was with her, he was happy. Besides, the evening at the beach was the best thing they could have done.

They were both so busy that the idea to even think about the next date, not to mention actually go on a date, never had the chance to enter their minds. Both were stressed, as the big accident left them all in charge of admitting injured people.

She saw him, yet again, briefly on the hall, his eyes softening when he noticed her. His shoulders were tensed, his handsome face was twisted in a frown and his hands were gripping the folder he was holding tightly, knuckles white.

Claire wanted to help him take the edge off. She just didn’t know what to do. It wasn’t like she could just steal him away from all the commotion and have him breathe, simply be. Without any burdens or worries, for just one moment. And then, she remembered the small souvenir she brought with her from their last date.

She had the keys to his office, just in case she’d need to check something on Naveen’s files. Making sure no one would see her, she sneaked in, closed the door quietly behind her, and approached his desk.

Her first idea was to just leave the photo on his desk, but she knew that if someone was with him when he found it, he would get flustered and the effect might not be the one she desired. So instead, she decided to make it a little more subtle. Grabbing the pen laying on the desk, she turned the photo and wrote on the back of it a short message, tracing it softly with her fingers, before hiding the picture in the drawer that she knew he used to store the chocolate bars she gave him. Throwing one last look at the room, she slipped out of the door, closing them with a soft click behind her.

\-----

Ethan was tired. The commotion in the hospital was taking its toll on him, he wanted nothing more than to just go back home and lay down, go to sleep. But that wouldn’t happen for at least the next few hours, and it made him anxious.

To make things worse, he could barely focus, because all his mind was capable of doing today was running towards a certain red head.

Realizing that he has feelings for her, and that she might reciprocate them was what was keeping him afloat in the sea of despair that surrounded him from every which way. The picture of her face, that appeared every time his eyes closed, even for a split second, made him smile, and he couldn’t wait to see her again, hug her and, hopefully, never let her go again.

He entered his office, a pile of papers that needed his attention was sitting on his desk, almost as if they were mocking him.

Sitting down in his chair he propped his elbows on the flat, smooth surface of the desk, hiding his face in his hands, groaning in frustration. Today was not his day, he could feel the headache starting, his muscles were hurting, and no amount of coffee was able to wake him up.

Almost as if he didn’t think before doing it, his hand reached to the drawer for a small chocolate bar that Claire gave him in the morning. Well, giving it to him was an understatement.

She sneakily threw it into the pocket of his lab coat, smirking softly, innocently as she did that. He didn’t want it to melt or get damaged, so he threw it into the drawer of his desk before running out of the room.

Now all he could think about was that sweet treat. Opening the hiding place he found the envelope, sitting right on top of the chocolate. He picked it up, turning it in his hands to search for any clue as to what it might have been, but he found nothing.

Taking a look inside, he found a photo. Sliding it out of the envelope, his cheeks reddened as he recognized the circumstances, in which the photo was taken.

The sight of them both, embraced so closely and intimately, though all she was doing was trying to calm him down, made his heart soar. Tracing his fingers softly over her face, he smiled knowingly. He was about to put the photo back in the envelope, when something on the back of it caught his eye. Turning it over, he saw her handwriting, neat and delicate.

_Thank you for allowing me to see your vulnerable side._

_Love,_

_Claire_

The smile that appeared on his face was there for the rest of the day, giving him the energy he needed.

\-----

The next day, Ethan was determined to find her and just hug her. He finally knew why she wouldn’t kiss him, and while there was nothing else he’d rather be doing right now, he understood. For now, hugs and closeness were enough.

Walking from the ER towards the nurse’s desk, he spotted red, cutting the air. Turning towards the room, he saw Claire, sitting at the edge of the bed, holding hands with the man laying next to her. He looked a little tired, dehydrated and there were a few cuts on his face, but other than that he seemed to be okay, at least, without further examination, he did.

The man was smiling, laughing with her as he said something she found awfully funny. One of his hands reached to touch her arm, squeezing it lightly, with affection.

Ethan felt the sparks of jealousy in his chest. The sight of another man, holding her, having her full and undivided attention, made his heart ache. He knew that Claire and he weren’t together, but he wanted to believe that they were getting somewhere. Now, he wasn’t so sure anymore.

Deciding to not make a fool out of himself, he left without a word.

\-----

Claire was having a pretty good day, all her patients were stable, no emergencies that would cloud her mind or make her stressed. The only thing she was lacking, was a good hug. And she knew just the place to receive that.

Initially, she intended to go to his office, but he beat her to the punch. She saw his body, clad in a white lab coat, emerging from behind the corner, a scowl on his face.

“Dr. Ramsey! Wait!” she called out his name, but he just looked at her with a strange look in his eyes and turned around, leaving her alone and confused.

_What just happened?_

She wasn’t sure what caused that kind of a reaction in him. Was he angry at her for getting the photo? She tried to think about all the things she did recently, tried to find the source of his fool mood, but nothing came to her mind.

The situation repeated itself a couple more times over the next few days, leaving her more and more disoriented. And hurt. She thought that if something bothered him, he’d come to her so they could talk it over. And something _did_ seem to occupy his mind. Yet, he didn’t come to her. He blocked her out, just like he used to do before they started…

_Exactly. What were they?_

Claire wasn’t sure what they were. She knew he had feeling for her. She knew she had feelings for him. They both wanted it. So what was stopping her?

Deep down, she knew. No matter how hard she tried denying it, she knew. It was her body’s and her mind’s protective mechanism. She was just making sure that she wouldn’t get hurt again.

As another day drew to a close, she was certain that she would not be able to sleep until she knew what was troubling him. She hated the idea of them going on about their lives with something like this hanging between them, like a deep, wide river she couldn’t cross to get to him.

Her body knew the way to his office so well, that she didn’t even have to think about which turn to take. With each step closer to him, her heart hammered in her chest harder and faster, her nervousness was through the roof.

Knocking softly on the wooden panel, she heard a quiet ‘come in’, before opening the door and sliding in, shutting them behind her with a click.

Their eyes met, but his were blank. She knew his walls were coming up again, and she felt bad. Something big must have happened, and she was a little disappointed that he didn’t come to her to talk about it.

“Can I help you with something, Dr. Herondale?” his voice was a little harsh, all the gentleness and emotions gone.

“Are you okay? You seem…”

“I’m fine. Is that all?” he interrupted her, not taking his eyes off the papers laying in front of him.

“_Ethan, _I can tell something is not right. Talk to me.”

“Why don’t you go and talk to that patient you have in there?” he mumbled under his breath, wincing when he realized his words were a little more understandable and louder than he would have liked.

“Okay, what are you talking about? What do you mean ‘patient’” to say she was confused would be an understatement of the century.

“I was serious, Claire. Go talk to him, I’m sure he’s going to have a good story to tell you.”

“I’m talking to _you_. Tell me what is going on?”

She was trying to comb her mind for anything he might have seen and taken out of context. And that’s when it hit her.

“Oh my god, are you _jealous?_”

“I’m not.”

“Oh, you so are! And over Linny, of all people…”

“Claire, I don’t need to hear it. I don’t _want_ to hear it. Please, just leave it, would you.”

“Ethan, I’m serious. How long have you been stressing yourself out over this?”

She could see how his face twisted in embarrassment, before going back to its normal, neutral state.

“Ever since I saw you two…” he quietly admitted, not meeting her eyes.

“And why didn’t you come to me to talk about it? You know I’m here whenever you need anything, yet you chose to go through this alone.”

“I… didn’t want to admit it to anyone. That I’m jealous. Hell, I didn’t want to admit that to myself at first.”

“Oh, Ethan…” she wasn’t sure what she was supposed to do. He was insecure, still didn’t know that he had nothing to worry about. She was going to show him how wrong he was.

Approaching his desk, she turned his chair around so he faced her, their eyes locked as she leaned forward.

“I need you to come with me.” She whispered, kissing his forehead softly.

Taking his hand in hers, she dragged him out of his office. Her fingers were tracing circles on his skin, doing her best to calm him down, as she knew that there was probably a storm in his mind.

They made their way to the third floor and opened the door to the room. The same man he saw her with a couple of days ago was laying in bed, reading a book. When they entered the room, his eyes lit up upon seeing her.

“Claire! Hi! What took you so long?” laughing he closed the book and set it on the bedside table.

“I do have a job, you know that, right?” she laughed too, before squeezing Ethan’s hand, pulling him in after her in the direction of the man.

“Oh, I know. It’s just that I missed you, that’s all.”

“Ethan, please, meet Lin Edwards. Linny, meet Ethan Ramsey. He’s one of the doctors here and…”

“Your boyfriend?” he interrupted her, a smirk on his face. Claire stopped midsentence, unsure how he knew about that.

“How… we’re not dating…”

“_Yet. _I can see it in your eyes, Claire. And in his, too.” Lin extended his hand to Ethan. He shook it, acting as civilized as he could in the current circumstances. The fact that he noticed something was between them wasn’t enough for him to be calm about the whole situation, as he also saw how Lin looked at Claire. His grip on her fingers tightened slightly and she felt his tension.

“Ethan, Lin is my friend from way back, we attended high school together, and then the art school. That’s how we know each other.”

“Almost twelve years, huh? When did all that time go?” Lin mused, smiling at her.

“How is Vanessa?”

“Oh, she’s doing great. She actually asked me to say hi from her and ask you if you’d be up for a boat trip with us.” Claire nodded enthusiastically, and when she turned to Ethan, she saw a silent question in his eyes.

“Vanessa is his wife. We’ve known each other almost as long as I know Lin. And they have two kids, lovely little boys. I’m actually a godmother to one of them.”

“Yes, Sebastian has been asking about you. You have to come over.”

“Lin, I don’t know if you are aware of it or not, but New York is kind of far away.” She laughed again, falling into the relaxed routine. Ethan watched her, feeling all his anxiousness dissipate with every word coming from her mouth.

“I know that. Just… the next time you can, come visit us. And bring Ethan along, I’m sure Nessa would be thrilled to meet him.” Lin shifted his eyes from Claire to him, approval in them.

“I’ll make sure she finds some time to do that.” He spoke up, smirking at her shocked face. Claire moved to hug him, pressed herself against his side, placing her head on his chest.

“Okay, Linny, you have to rest. I’ll come back tomorrow to check on you, how about that?” she said as they were making their way out of the room.

“Only if you bring cheesecake!” he called out after them.

“I’ll see what I can do.” Laughing, she closed the door behind them and they made their way back to his office.

“So…” Claire’s voice trailed off once they were alone again.

“I’m sorry. I jumped into conclusions. I shouldn’t have done that. You didn’t deserve my cold demeanor.”

“No, I didn’t. But I’m so happy we got that out of the way.”

He was sitting in his office chair again and she was standing in front of him, running her fingers through his hair. Their eyes met and he started leaning towards her, but she put her thumb on his lips, tracing the outlines of it softly.

“Not yet?” he asked, a little disappointed.

“No.”

Taking his head in her hands she leaned forward to whisper in his ear.

“But trust me, _I’ll make sure the wait is worth your while._” Her lips made their way from his ear to his cheek before looking into his eyes again, a teasing smile on her face.

“I can’t stay away from you.” his whisper was more like a prayer, breathless and emotional.

“Good. Because I don’t want you to stay away from me.” She sat down in his lap and turned towards the pile of paperwork in front of them.

Her eyes caught a new item on the desk. It was the photo she gave him, framed and placed in the center, making it impossible to miss.

“You framed that?” she asked, her voice small, but filled with happiness.

“Of course I did. It is our first proper photo together. How could I now frame it and keep it close to me?”

Ethan blushed a little, stroking her hair while she was staring at the framed picture in front of them. Turning around to him, she hugged him tightly, her lips by his ear again.

_“I have mine framed too. It’s sitting on my bedside table.”_

“Well then, I definitely need to see it.” smirking at her adoringly, he traced his hands down her back, hugging her closer.

“Who know. Maybe one day you will.” Winking, she turned back and they both started working on their paperwork.


	9. IX

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Birthdays and fantasies go together.

He was thinking about it. He was dreaming about it. It stopped him from thinking rationally more than he’d like to admit. Visited his dreams and left him wanting more, only to have him wake up in the middle of the night, feeling strained and frustrated.

Kissing her.

Ethan was falling for her, more and more every day. If someone asked him about it a few months ago, he’d call them stupid and his stomach would drop. He used to be so scared of those feelings. Now, he couldn’t imagine it any other way.

She was there. And that alone made him happy.

He didn’t want to pressure her, but he couldn’t deny the fact that he was craving to feel her lips on his again. They spent so much time together, working, taking care of Naveen that has been gaining his strength back after the phages therapy Claire came up with. He was getting his mentor back, he was fighting to get Claire back, and he felt like he was getting back a part of him that was lost during his argument with her. Everything was falling back to its place, and that alone made him feel much more stable.

He woke up, the image of Claire disappearing from his vision, blurring and then vanishing as the morning light invaded his eyes. It was the day like any other, even though he knew that for many it would be a reason to celebrate, to spend it with loved ones and friends. Maybe even have a party. But for him, it was a day off, granted by Harper, where he could just relax, lay on his couch with a good book, sleep a little longer, enjoy his morning coffee, take a walk to the park nearby. And, as of lately, he could invite Claire and go somewhere with her too, or just stay in and have her close.

It was his birthday. And nothing seemed out of order when he opened his eyes. He threw on a pair of sweatpants and went to the kitchen. Jenner ran to him, demanding attention. Ethan kneeled down, patting his pet on his head before going for some coffee. He never made it there, though, because the ring of the bell at the door stopped him dead in his tracks.

Behind the wooden panel stood Claire, dressed in a flowy dress, the color of lavender bringing her hair and eyes out, making them shine and sparkle. His eyes fell to her legs, the sandals on the slight heel making her legs seem longer than usual. The sudden urge to wrap those legs around him, keeping her as close to him as possible, flooded his senses.

“Enjoying the view, Dr. Ramsey? Because…” she took a step forward, catching him off guard, her index finger tracing the lines of his muscles on his chest. “… so am I. Though I see that you haven’t learned anything from the last time I was here. Not that I’m complaining.” Flashing him a smile, she went around him to get inside his apartment, leaving him at the door and greeting Jenner with a small laugh.

“Mind telling me why you are here? Don’t get me wrong, I love your company, but I’m just surprised. We didn’t have anything planned, right?” a spike of panic shot through him at the idea of forgetting something she may have said.

“No, we didn’t. But, a little birdy told me that _someone_ here is celebrating their birthday today. And…” fixing him a fake scowl, she locked her eyes on him. “… _someone _failed to inform me about it. Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Cause I don’t usually celebrate it. It’s a day like any other, nothing special.” Shrugging, he went to his bedroom to change, keeping the door open so they could talk. He heard her footsteps, felt her eyes on his naked back as he put his clothes on. “That view is still only for you, in case you were wondering.” He looked back at her, offering a teasing smile. She blushed a little, her eyes catching his every move.

“Good.”

Once he was ready, he walked over to her. She ran her hands up and down his shoulders before bringing him down for a tight hug.

“Today is special. It’s your birthday, and because you are special, so is your birthday. Don’t fight it.” a delicate whisper filled his mind, her breath tickling his ear. “Now, come on. I have something special planned. I hope you don’t mind me driving.”

He was about to say something, a teasing smirk on his lips, when she caught on to his thought process and smacked his shoulder lightly, laughing. They went outside, her car parked near the entrance to his building. She unlocked it, and before she could reach for the handle, he was already there, holding the door open for her to get in. Then he made his way around the car, siting down in the passenger seat, fastening his seatbelt.

She started the car and sped down the street, leaving his neighborhood behind. From his position he could very clearly see her. Ethan wasn’t a person that was big on letting other people drive him, but something about seeing her behind the wheel made his heart beat faster. Turning to the side so he could watch her, he felt a smile tug on the corners of his lips.

“Are you going to tell me where we are going?”

“No.”

“Even if I say ‘please’?”

“Even if you beg. It’s a surprise, and I’m sure you’ll love it. But, for the record, I don’t mind if you beg from time to time.” Flashing him a smile, she threw him a sideway glance.

“Only if you return the favor.”

“With pleasure.” Her words caught him off guard, freezing him in place, making him speechless. She laughed, her right hand leaving the steering wheel to run up and down his thigh, squeezing it lightly before taking her hand away. He caught it midair and brought it to his lips, placing a tender kiss there.

After a few minutes of driving in silence, she put on the radio. Jumping through the stations she came to the conclusion that there was nothing worth her attention, so she turned to her CD player. Seconds later the music filled the space. Ethan was familiar with the songs that were being played, but he wasn’t that interested in them. He focused his attention on the woman next to him instead. Claire was belting the tunes, hitting all the notes, dancing a little while remaining the responsible driver, being mindful of her surroundings.

“I forgot what it’s like.” He muttered under his breath.

“What?”

“Having you so close to me. Feeling so… complete. _You _make me feel complete, Claire.” He reached over to her, his fingers grazing her copper locks softly, tugging them behind her ear before leaning back again. The comfortable silence fell over them both, the music filling their ears. The more they were driving, the less he recognized the roads they were taking, and that was confusing him.

Eventually, she stopped the car on a small parking spot near the edge of the forest and turned the engine off.

“Okay, birthday boy. Here we are, let’s go.”

“Here?” he took a look around, skeptical about the whole thing.

“Of course not. Now, don’t ask too many questions. You do trust me, don’t you?” she threw him a smile and got out of the car, heading towards the trunk. By the time he joined her, she had a picnic basket in her hand. He took it from her, keeping it in his right hand, while holding hers in his left, their fingers intertwined. Ethan noticed how she lowered her head a little, smiling with a hint of a blush coloring her cheeks. Claire pulled on his hand, leading him through the woods, taking her time.

Ten minutes of walking, during which Ethan somehow managed to trip and almost fall over the broken branch if it wasn’t for Claire’s hand in his and her quick reaction to push him against the tree to prevent him from falling. Their faces were so close he could feel her breath on his skin. She smiled teasingly and pulled him along, continuing their journey as though nothing had happened.

After another five minutes they reached the end of the trees. Before them stretched the endless field of light blue flowers, cutting through the green grass, lighting up their surroundings. Through the middle of the field ran a river, the water humming softly as it moved. He was moved by the tranquility of the place. It felt as though they were the only people in the world. They walked closer to the edge of the river, placing the basket down on the ground. She took out a blanket and put it down so they could sit. While she was busy pulling their food out of the containers, he turned away from her, picking up a few of the flowers, binding them together to form a bouquet.

The moment she turned around, he presented her with his creation, a shy smile on his lips, anxious of her reaction.

“Oh Ethan… those are beautiful.” She leaned in, kissing his cheek softly.

“Not as beautiful as you.” he murmured, lost in the feeling of her lips on his skin.

The food she brought with them was divine. Perfectly balanced and seasoned, light and ideal for a warm day like the one they were experiencing. She leaned back, her hands holding her in the sitting position as she watched him. He was a remarkable human being, a smart and compassionate man. He had his flaws, like every person, but those were overshadowed by how good he was, how hard he was working to right his wrongs, how much he cared about his patients. How sweet he became. Never would she have thought that _the_ Ethan Ramsey could be capable of such gestures of affection, yet here he was. He was learning every day, and she was by his side, honored to get to see it.

“You’re staring, Rookie.” He mused with a smile.

“I like looking at beautiful things.”

“Oh, so I’m a _thing_ to you?” his hand flew to his chest, pretending to be hurt. She leaned in, their faces close. When she spoke, he could feel her nose brush against his, both breathing the same air.

“If it makes you feel better…” she paused leaning in even closer. His eyes fluttered shut as he waited for her next move. For a moment it was silent, he didn’t know what was happening. Then, he felt her lips against his ear. “… you are my _favorite_ thing. Even if you are a little grumpy.” Leaving a small kiss there, she took off, running in the direction of the river. His eyes snapped open, realizing how she played him, yet again. He stood up, running after her.

“Rookie! Get back here, you little minx!” he laughed as she chased her. Her own laugh, like wind chimes, filled the air as she avoided his grasp, time and time again.

“You’ll have to catch me first! And we both know an old doctor like you can’t do that!”

Running back and forth down the edge of the river, circling each other, like predator and prey. She teased him, slowing down a few times, giving him false hope, only to speed up at the very last second. Ethan decided to catch her by surprise, since nothing else seemed to be working. He crouched in the high grass and waited. When she walked past him, he jumped up, wrapping his arms around her and lifting her in the air, twirling a little. Their laughs got louder, intensified by happiness and the feeling of being close.

“Got you.” his lips were by her ear, his arms wrapped tightly around her waist.

“You sure did. What are you going to do about it, Mr. Grumpy?” her voice was laced with a smile and anticipation. He turned her around so they were facing one another, his hands pressed flush against her back as their faces came closer together. His heart started beating faster, the suspense killing him. But again, in a very ‘Claire’ fashion, she turned her head to the side, his lips landing on her cheek. Laughter bubbled in his chest as he let out a deep sigh, resting his forehead on the side of her face.

“You’re killing me here, Claire.”

Instead of answering, she pulled on his hand towards the river. She took off her sandals, letting her bare feet touch the grass, then dipping them gently into the water. The warm sensation fell over her senses, her head fell back, allowing the sunlight to shine over her face. She closed her eyes, a soft smile blooming on her face.

“Are you going to join me here, or are you just going to stand there and stare?” she asked, not turning to look at him.

“You had your chance to stare at me. Now it’s my turn to stare at you. And what an exquisite sight it is.” Despite his words, he went over to her, losing his shoes along the way, his chest against her back, his fingers running up and down her arm, goosebumps raising. She let out a light moan at the sensation, smiling wider. Then, a spark of mischief flashed on her face as she took a few steps further into the water. He hesitated before following her, but before he could get any closer, he felt the water coming into the contact with his chest.

She splashed him with water. She began the war that she couldn’t win.

His hands dove into the warm liquid, rapidly moving them upwards in her direction, sending a small wave. Her dress got wet, so did the ends of her hair, and she squealed in surprise.

“Ethan!”

“What? You were the one that started it, Rookie. Own up to your mistakes.”

“Fine, fine. Truce?” she extended her hand towards him, raising her right eyebrow in question.

“Only if you admit that I won.” He flashed her a charming smile that reached his eyes, making them shine.

“… Okay, you won. But only because it’s your birthday.” Their hands met in a tight embrace, the skin tingling, sparks shooting up their arms.

They took a long way back to the blanket, enjoying the company of one another and the beauty of their surroundings. While Ethan had only a couple of spots wet, Claire’s dress was practically drenched. So, partially to dry it, partially to tease him, and partially to torment him, she took her dress off over her head when he was distracted with the landscape. The moment he turned back around and saw her only in her underwear, an innocent smile on her face, she knew it was worth it.

His eyes grew wide, pupils dilating, his mouth slightly open.

“Wh- what are you doing?” his voice cracked, stunned and taken off guard.

“My dress is wet, because _someone_ didn’t think about the amount of water he sent my way. I have to get it dry, and wearing it while it’s drenched is unhealthy. I would know. After all, I am a doctor, you know.” She winked at him playfully before marching on, leaving him behind, allowing him the view of her almost naked back, if it wasn’t for her lacy blue underwear. He swore under his breath, wondering what he did to deserve this, both the pleasure of seeing her, and the pain of not being able to touch her like he wanted to.

Thirty minutes later they were back on the blanket. He was sitting, she was laying down next to him, her dress next to her, drying in the sun. She took that as an opportunity to sunbathe, too good to pass on. So, here she was, laying on her stomach, her back turned towards the warm rays of sunshine, while she talked to Ethan, her head turned away from him. That allowed him to steal glances at her, sure that she wouldn’t catch him.

“I can feel you staring again, Ramsey.” She said slowly, not bothering to turn around. “If you wanted to see me in my underwear, you should have just asked. You didn’t have to drench me in water to get me to undress.”

“I- wha- no! That’s not- that wasn’t-“ he started stuttering, her words taking him by surprise. She laughed, having trouble containing her emotions. She was having too much fun with teasing him. Claire sat up, turning her head to look at him. His cheeks were stained with a deep pink blush, his eyes showing just how embarrassed he was.

“Relax, I’m just teasing you. I know that you would think of something much more efficient to get me to undress.” Winking at him, she retreated, her back on the ground, giving him a view of her chest. “Stare all you want, that view is only for you anyway.” She smirked as she repeated his own words.

“Were you always this cocky? I don’t remember you being so outspoken.”

“When I’m with you I just am. I’m telling the truth and I can be _loud_.” Smirking, she replied. Even without opening her eyes, she could see in her mind how he smiled at her, his ears red.

The day went on, spent on quiet talking, soft touches and kisses peppered all over their faces and hands. He was amazed at how well she knew him. If it was anyone else, they would probably take him somewhere loud, with a lot of people. But she knew better, she knew how much he valued silence and tranquility. And he was the happiest man on earth to get to share those feelings with her.

“I don’t think I told you that, but I really am happy you gave me a second chance. I’ve been a fool and I almost lost you. Those last few weeks I got to spend with you were the happiest memories of my life. It’s not an exaggeration. You make me happy, you brighten my days, you put everything into perspective for me. You showed me how light the life can be when you let go of your fears. When you reach for something you really want.” he stopped talking, taking her hand in his, rubbing circles on the inside of her wrist. “You showed me what it’s like to live the life to the fullest. And you were right. It’s not complicated. It’s not easy, but it’s perfectly clear to me now. I wake up every day and I feel gratitude towards the force that brought you back to me. I will never take you for granted. Thank you, Claire. Thank you for saving me.”

His eyes were filled to the brim with emotions, his hands holding on to her. He could see how his words affected her, with every second that passed it sunk deeper into her, until it nested into her heart and mind. She threw her arms around him, pulling him in for a tight hug. His head fell onto her shoulder, his nose nuzzling into her neck with tenderness and affection. He took a deep breath in, the scent of orange blossoms engulfing him, taking over his senses completely.

“Ethan?”

“Yes?”

“I think it’s time for your birthday gift.” She pulled away, her eyes sparkling. He brought his hand to her cheek, caressing the skin there.

“You didn’t have to get me anything. You are here with me, it’s more than I could ever ask for.”

“I know. But I still got you something. Close your eyes, I’ll get it.”

He complied, the darkness taking over his vision. Taking away his sight heightened his other senses, that’s how he knew that she didn’t go that far away, and came back soon after. She seemed to have kneeled before him, her scent giving away where she was. He felt her hair tickling his jaw and her breath on his face. She was nervous.

“Happy birthday, Ethan.” She whispered, and her lips touched his.


	10. X

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Celebrations continue with more surprises to come.

He saw fireworks, exploding right before his eyes.

There were many occasions on which he imagined what it would be like to kiss her again. The memory of her body, pressed flush against his on the balcony in Miami, the way she fit perfectly into his arms. How he felt his heart stop when he heard his own name fall from her lips, an emotional whisper, full of longing and desire, finally released.

Now, he didn’t have to imagine those things.

She placed her hand on his cheek, keeping him from any movement. Her lips on his, stealing his breath away, overtaking his every thought, flooding his mind with pictures. She then leaned back, almost hesitant, waiting for him to open his eyes and look at her. He was afraid to do that, scared that the moment would disappear the second he lifted his eyelids. That didn’t happen, though, because she was there, sitting right in front of him, biting her lip, looking at him with caution.

“Ethan? Are you-“ he didn’t wait for her to finish his sentence.

Instead, he took her in his arms, pressing himself to her. Their lips met again, kissing with newfound confidence and without a care in the world. Her fingers went to his hair, stroking the silky strands, her nails scratching his scalp softly. He placed his hands on her shoulder blades, smoothing his palms over her skin.

They separated when air became a necessity, pressing their foreheads together, eyes closed, breathing heavily. Claire moved her hands down, wrapping her arms around his neck as they embraced. The only sounds that surrounded them were the gentle movement of the water in the river and the delicate singing of the birds in the forest. Neither was ready to disturb the tranquility of the moment, holding onto it for a while longer.

Finally, he dared to open his eyes again. Hers were already on him, observing curiously. She smiled softly, running her fingers over the back of his head. Ethan breathed in deeply, running his gaze along the lines of her face.

“You’re still here…” he whispered, his voice filled with amazement. She giggled at his words, touching his nose with the tip of her finger softly.

“Why, did you think I was going to kiss you and run away?”

“No, it’s just that… usually by the time I open my eyes, I wake up and I’m alone again.”

“Ah, so you’ve been dreaming about me.” Her words were spoken in a teasing manner and he couldn’t fight the slight blush that creeped onto his cheeks if he tried.

“Since I was a kid. You’re the girl of my dreams, you know that.” She nodded before resting her head on his shoulder, hugging him one more time.

“Now, as much as I would love to stay here forever with you, we have one more stop on my birthday list. And it’s a one I would never dare to miss, so we have to get going.”

She stood up, putting her dress back on, cleaning up the area. After she was done, she leaned down, pressing a tender kiss to his lips, her hands on both sides of his face, pulling him up softly. He complied, wrapping his arms around her, trying to deepen the kiss, but she pulled away.

“No, no, no, no, no, Ramsey, we are not doing this now. If I hadn’t stopped you, you would have made us late. I’m not having that. Now on this occasion.” She bit her lip nervously as she picked up the basket and, once again, he took it from her, only this time his arm wrapped around her waist.

“Where _are_ we going? You seem nervous.”

“It’s nothing, really. I just want it to be perfect. Come on, let’s get moving. Try not to trip, I know your tricks, and I’m _not _falling for them. At least not now, understood?” she warned him playfully with her finger right before his face, and he leaned in to kiss it quickly.

They made their way back to the car, put away the basket and got inside. He insisted on driving, but she was having none of it.

“Let me drive.”

“Hell no, Ramsey. I would have to tell you where we are going, and that would ruin it all. You are staying in your passenger’s seat. End of discussion.” Her tone was serious, but she did have a smile on her face.

“I _love_ it when you are in charge.” He teased slightly, looking at her, capturing the way her lips curled into a smirk.

“You don’t even know what you just got yourself into.”

The car drive was getting longer and longer, much longer than he have remembered, even though they were going back the same way they came. Though, that _may_ have had something to do with the fact that Ethan clearly insisted on touching, kissing and teasing every part of her that he could reach, effectively distracting her from the road. That, in turn, made her slow down or stop altogether many times, and when he did it again, she stopped the car at the red light and turned to him.

“Ethan, if you don’t stop that, we will never get there on time. And if we are late, you can be sure that you will not get any kisses tonight. Behave.”

Needless to say, that worked wonders.

\---- ---- ----

They pulled up to the familiar neighborhood and Ethan immediately knew just where Claire was taking him. An incredulous look was painted all over his face.

“My sister’s restaurant? Really, Claire?”

“Honestly, who else did you think told me about your birthday? Come on, we are just on time.” She got out of the car, waiting for him to catch up to her. When he stood next to her, she grabbed his hand in hers, lacing their fingers together as they walked, soft smiles on their faces.

The restaurant was dimly lit with delicate lights, a few flowers here and there. There were more people than last time, but Claire, from what Sophie had told her, knew that those people were his family. And she was both excited and nervous to meet them. Just like last time, the second they went through the door, a loud scream pierced through the air, and moment later she had her arms restricted by Ethan’s sister.

“Claire! I missed you so much! And you managed to actually bring Mr. Grumpypants with you! I told you, guys, she’s a good one.” she turned towards the rest of her family before throwing herself on Ethan, hugging him tightly. Meanwhile, his eyes were on Claire.

“What? I told you, you are grumpy. And you didn’t believe me.” She replied to the question in his eyes, laughing. He laughed along after a moment of resilience, deciding ultimately that it’s in vain.

Louise approached them slowly, hugging her son, and then pulling Claire closer, kissing both of her cheeks before hugging her too.

“I’m so happy you managed to come here. We have been waiting to have an opportunity to meet as a family like that for years.”

“I actually didn’t know anything until five minutes ago. She didn’t tell me.” Ethan looked at the woman by his side, his arm sliding softly to her waist, holding her close.

“I’m proud. I would have done the same. Now, come, Claire, the rest of us want to meet you.”

One by one, she met the rest of the Ramsey family, his aunt Marie, his cousins Jackson, who had his wife, Alex, with him, and Mark, whose girlfriend, Evie, was standing with Sophie a little further away. She also met Andrew, Ethan’s father, who was… well, a little like Ethan himself. Incredibly driven by what he wanted, focused and impossibly, sometimes even annoyingly, stubborn. Come to think of it, it was most likely that this was the exact reason for which Ethan couldn’t find common ground with his father. Because they were so much alike, they both refused to back down.

As Ethan expected, his whole family fell in love with her, almost as much as he did. The ladies grabbed her and wanted to drag her away from him almost immediately, while men did the same to him. He raised his left hand for a moment, pulling Claire in for a quick peck on the cheek, before letting her go, a wide smile on her face and a playful wink as Sophie pulled on her hand to join the rest of the female party, squealing with glee.

And so, the party has divided. The second he was alone with the male part of his family, his cousins grabbed him by his arms, slapping his back with a little bit of pride. For a moment he was questioning the right of their minds, but then he realized that they have never seen him with anyone. And certainly not as happy as he was now, so it all made sense that they were happy for him.

“So, Soph said that you two are not together. But seeing you today, I’d say otherwise. Care to explain?” Jackson asked, sitting down next to him on his left side. Mark sat down on his right side, making it impossible for him to escape questioning.

“Yeah, tell us.”

“Christ, you two are acting like our ladies over there with all the gossiping.” Ethan groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose to hide the hint of a blush that settled on his cheeks at the mention of his new relationship with Claire.

“_Our ladies?_ So you two _are_ dating!”

“It’s… complicated. I screwed up in the past, and I’ve been trying to win her back ever since. I guess you could say that today marks the first day of our new relationship.”

“Screwed up? How so?” Jackson tilted his head to one side suspiciously, looking over his shoulder in the direction of the female part of the party. Claire was talking to Alex, laughing at something she said. They all looked comfortable with each other, and Claire seemed like one of the most bright and good people he has ever met. He then looked back to Ethan, his expression hardening visibly. “Please tell me you didn’t hurt her.”

He was met with silence. Ethan was too embarrassed with what he had done to talk about it, not on that occasion anyway, but the reaction of his cousin startled him. He asked a question with his eyes, and Jackson only shrugged his shoulders.

“She seems like a good one, and for some reason she still wants you, despite whatever you had done. She’s like a sister to me. Don’t screw it up again, I am watching you.”

“You have known her for only thirty minutes! How is she your sister already? And you are _my_ cousin.” Ethan wanted to seem offended or taken aback, but truth be told, he knew perfectly well what had happened. She wrapped his cousins around her little finger, and from now on, they would protect her from any harm. The same way she wrapped him around her finger.

“You don’t have to worry.” He looked back to glance at the redhead, a lovestruck expression residing on his face. “I don’t intend to make that mistake ever again. I’m just worried that she doesn’t want me as much as I want her.”

Andrew watched his son with an emotionless face, and Ethan felt a wave of uncomfortableness wash over him. He couldn’t figure out what his father was thinking. They have never seen eye to eye, always arguing, always disagreeing on almost everything. His mother and sister tried, time and time again, to mend their relationship, but it was not an easy task. He knew it would take a lot of time and effort to build anything with his father, and he wasn’t sure if they both had enough of both of those things to make it work.

“Ethan, sweetheart, come here. Boys, come along, it’s time for cake.” Marie called out, waving her hand at them.

Claire stood up from her seat, walking over to him, meeting him halfway, wrapping one arm behind his back, hugging him softly. He kissed her hair, smiling to himself, their closeness bringing a sense of calm to him.

His mother and sister brought the cake to the table. It was all chocolate as far as he could tell, and Claire was grinning suspiciously. The candles were lit, and he was supposed to blow them out. Surprising no one, he refused. And, surprising no one, Claire made it her mission to convince him to do so. She didn’t have to do much, really. He was coming undone with just one look from her, but the way she subtly bit her lip might have had to do something with him ultimately relenting and doing as he was asked.

The cake was cut and everyone got the piece. Ethan liked his sweets, but he had to say that this cake was one of the best he ever had.

“That is delicious.” He murmured as he took another bite.

“Why, thank you.” Claire spoke up, sitting next to him, eating her own piece. His eyes shot open wider, looking at her with confusion.

“You made this?”

“Where do you think I was yesterday? I came here and baked you a cake, then decorated it with Soph and your Mom.”

“That is why I couldn’t reach you all afternoon?” she nodded, confirming his way of thinking. He shook his head. She was visiting his own family more than he was, and it got him thinking that maybe he should join her on those trips more often.

Claire caught Louise’s eye, a quick look carrying the silent question. She nodded, standing up without a word. Ethan touched her waist softly, confusion written all over his face. She stopped in her movement, hesitating for only a moment. Then, she leaned down, pressing a delicate kiss on his lips, whispering a quiet ‘hold on, I’ll be right back’, before smirking and leaving the room with his mother.

He turned back towards the rest of his family, only to find them staring at him, wide smiles on their faces. His father was looking at him with a intrigued look on his face. Sophie was jumping on her seat; he has never seen her this excited. Both of his cousins were looking at him with suggestive smirks.

“Do you really have doubts that she wants you? What are you, blind?”

“I think he is as blind as he is in love… I can’t believe I just said that about him.” Mark joked, looking past him, his eyes training on Claire. “And from the looks of it, she loves you too. Do _not_ screw it up, or we will make you suffer.” He might have been joking, but he was deadly serious.

Moments later both women were back, Claire giggling slightly. She sat down placing a small rectangular box in front of him.

“Happy birthday, Ethan.”

“I already got my present from you.” he said, confused. She shook her head, squeezing his hand slightly.

“It’s from all of us. Claire had her input though. As a matter of fact, it was her idea.” His mother explained, smiling at the redhead by his side. He looked at her with a question in his eyes.

“Stop stalling, just open it.”

He lifted the lid of the box slowly, revealing a slim, golden pen. The second he saw it, he knew why she chose it. He looked at her, impressed and moved.

“You are not the only person that listens and remembers. I pay attention to you too, you know? And you said that you needed to get yourself a decent pen. We decided to do that for you.”

“Thank you. I really like it.”

“You haven’t seen what is engraved on it yet. Look.” She put her hands on his, twisting the pen around to reveal a neat line running along the clip.

_Dr Terminator_

“I see that input of yours, Claire.” He laughed, pulling her in, kissing her cheek. After a moment of consideration, he went for a real kiss, lasting for a short second, avoiding making other people uncomfortable. He heard a subtle whistle in the background, which made Claire laugh, hugging herself to him.

The rest of their evening was spent in calm atmosphere, music, food, and, to Ethan’s horror, his childhood stories. He tried preventing his family from speaking, covering Claire’s ears, distracting her (she scolded him for that… but wasn’t offended), everything that came to his mind, to no avail. She found out a lot about him, saw him from another side, and she loved what she saw.

At one point, his father asked him to talk to him, and Claire could feel his muscles tensing. She squeezed his thigh under the table, a quiet sign of support. _You can do this, you’ll be fine. _He kissed her forehead and followed Andrew to the back room.

He couldn’t remember the last time he has spoken to his father face to face, alone. The fact that he has no idea what the conversation could be about made him even more nervous. He lingered by the door, allowing himself to have a quick exit in case it ended the way it always did.

“What did you want to talk about?” he started, biting his tongue to keep himself from being rude. Claire wouldn’t want him to lose his cool, and he wouldn’t want to disappoint her.

“Listen… I know we don’t see eye to eye. And I know that after everything that we did in the past, it’s not going to be resolved with a short conversation today. I never really saw you for who you are, simply because I didn’t stop for long enough to actually look at you. And today, seeing you with Claire… I saw the side of you I never thought I’d see. She really is important to you, I can see it. And she cares about you too. It opened my eyes, made me realize that I don’t really even know you. I would like a chance to make it right. I want to get to know the real you, son. If you let me.”

His father sounded sincere, like he really meant what he was saying. Ethan couldn’t deny that, deep inside, he wished this day would come, and his father would actually talk to him. The air between the two men was filled with tension as the silence stretched, until, finally, he spoke.

“I think that we both are at fault here, and we both have a lot of work to do. But I would like to try.”

He extended his hand towards his father, but hesitated. It didn’t seem right in that moment, felt out of place. Eventually, they settled for a little awkward hug, patting each other on the back. Afterwards, they went back to the party, the tension that was between them before almost gone, the air much lighter.

He sat back down next to Claire, his hand immediately reaching for hers. She laced their fingers together, concern on her face as he turned to look at her.

“Are you okay?” she whispered softly, searching in his eyes for any indication of anything out of place. She found nothing.

“I think we will be.”

Evening turned into night, and after saying goodbye to his family, his mother hugging and kissing Claire, Sophie crushing her with her arms, both his cousins hugging her playfully and his father squeezing her hand with respect, they were back in her car.

He had his hand on her thigh as they talked, and the whole car ride went by like flash. She parked near his apartment, keeping the engine on, before turning to him.

“Did you enjoy your birthday?”

“I couldn’t ask for better.” He smiled, taking in the sight of her in the dim light of the streetlights coming through the windows.

“And your presents?” she smirked, leaning a little closer to him.

“I can tell you for sure that I will be using both of them.” He leaned in the rest of the way, pressing their lips together.

The kiss was everything they needed at the moment. He tangled his hand into her hair, pulling her as close to him as he could in the confinement of the car. She sighed, her arms wrapping around his neck, biting his lower lip, teasing him. A deep groan filled the air around them, and if it wasn’t for the fact that they were in the car, he would probably not be able to stop himself from pulling her even closer.

“The things I would do to you…” he whispered against her lips, causing her to giggle.

“Unfortunately, we both have work tomorrow. And you need your sleep, just as much as I do. I’m afraid this is where we separate for the night, Dr Terminator.” That made him laugh along with her, and with a final couple of kisses, he went home, with the biggest smile on his face he had in the past couple of weeks.

That night, his mind didn’t need to imagine Claire. He was reliving his memories.


	11. XI

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another birthday, another family and plans for the future.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter includes a NSFW moment, or, as I got used to saying:  
I sinned  
Enjoy! <3

_Five weeks later_

Naveen made his way down the hall, a phone by his ear as he approached Ethan’s office. It was three weeks after he has been cured, and he was stronger every day. By now, the whole illness was barely a memory. He smiled widely as a person he talked to laughed into his ear.

“Yeah, that sounds like Claire. She always knew what she wanted, and always hated surprises. I can’t imagine her being ecstatic about us coming unannounced, but you only have birthday once a year, and I’m not about to let such an opportunity slide by.” Claire’s mother, Ana, giggled as she pondered on the reaction her daughter would have upon seeing her whole family in a few days.

“I’m sure that she’ll be happy to see you. And even if she is a little nervous, Ethan will calm her down, no problem.”

“Ah, yes, the Ramsey one. How is he treating her? After the way she crashed when I last saw her, I wanted to rip his head off.” She asked, an edge in her voice.

“Ethan? Oh, you have nothing to worry about. I have never seen a man more in love with someone, even if he himself doesn’t know it yet. He kisses the ground she’s walking on, he knows what she wants before she even thinks about it. It’s like they have one mind… which is actually quite disturbing, now that I think about it.” he rushed to explain what has been happening in the past weeks, laughing as he remembered the time Ethan carried Claire everywhere because she sprained her ankle, requesting they were on the same cases that day so he could help her as much as he could.

“You know what they say, the more time you spend with someone, the more you become like them. You eased my mind, thank you, Naveen.” A beat passed, something clicked in the phone. “I’m sorry, but I have to go. I’ll see you in a few days, yes?”

“Me, Ethan, his family, and our Sunshine. Take care, Ana.”

“Bye, Naveen.”

He shoved his phone into the pocket of his white coat as he stood before the door leading to Ethan’s office. He knew that they were probably both inside, and various things could be happening. For that, and only that reason, he grabbed the doorknob, covering his eyes with his other hand and went in.

“I’m coming in, put your clothes back on and stand a meter away from each other.” He exclaimed as he let the door fall shut behind him.

Letting his fingers separate, one by one, he slowly opened his eyes. Ethan was sitting in his office chair, Claire sitting in the one on the other side of the table, both looking at him as though he said something ridiculous. She was the first one to shake out from her initial reaction, going back to the file before her.

“Naveen, you’re entering the room, not deactivating a bomb.” She sighed, amused, with just a hint of a smile on her lips.

“I’m just trying to not make the same mistake twice.” He smirked as he sat down next to her on the second chair.

“It was one time! And it was an accident!” she exclaimed, throwing her hair behind her shoulders.

“Excuse me, but losing all your clothes in the supply closet is not an accident, Sunshine.”

“It was _his_ fault!” she shouted, pointing her finger at Ethan, who is watching them bicker in silence.

“You’re going to let her badmouth you, Ethan?”

“She’s not wrong, you know. I take full responsibility for that incident. I also take full responsibility for it to never happen again.” he leaned back in his chair, his arms folded over his chest.

“Good, because-“

“I’ll personally lock the door next time.” Ethan finished with a satisfied smirk, making Naveen laugh, while Claire blushed furiously, shaking her head.

“I guess it’s the best I will get, so I’ll take it.”

They all focused on the case at hand after that, the previous conversation forgotten. Claire got called to her patient, leaving the two men alone. Naveen watched the other doctor closely, before asking.

“What are you getting her for her birthday?”

Ethan raised his eyes to meet Naveen’s, a tiny smile on his lips. That told him that he had something planned, and that he was extremely proud of himself because of it.

“I thought we could have dinner in your sister’s restaurant? The three of us, plus whoever from your family is there?”

“Uh, yeah, sure. Sophie is probably dying to see her again. How about 3 pm? We have a free day, we’ll have time to get ready.” Ethan responded, clearly not paying enough attention to see anything suspicious in the way his mentor was looking at him.

“Great! I’ll let you get back to your work now, see you later.” Naveen said, standing up and going towards the door with the widest grin he ever had.

\--- --- ---

The light of the day peaked through the curtains as she rolled over to the other side of his bed, only to find it empty. She remembered very vividly how they ended up in bed the night before, in a heat of pent-up emotions from the day, slowly peeling the layers that covered them before they fell onto the mattress, kissing like there was nothing else in the world.

His side of the bed was cold, which meant that he was gone for more than a short while. She stretched, moaning softly, her hands reaching high above her head, her eyes closed.

“Careful with those noises you’re making, or I’ll have to pin your hands right where they are now.” his low voice filled her ears as he entered the room, a tray in his hands. He placed it on the bedside table, taking her hands in his and pulling her into a sitting position. His lips pressed against hers in a soft kiss, smiling at how close they were.

“Happy birthday, Rookie.” He whispered against her lips, gently and happily.

“Thank you.” she muttered, looking into his eyes. “How long have you been up? This thing there must have taken ages to make.”

“About an hour, everything for you.”

They spent the next thirty minutes eating and talking, laughter filling the space between them. He set the tray back on the table before she pulled him into the bed again, falling into his arms as soon as he was close enough for her to do so. That way, they fell back into the peaceful slumber, waking up at 1 pm, having a decent amount of time to get ready.

Ethan didn’t have the opportunity to see her getting ready, so when he stepped out of the bathroom in his white shirt, his jacket in his hand, and saw her by the mirror, his legs almost gave out from beneath him. She was a vision, her red hair falling freely, framing her face, her dress hugging her in all the right places, flowing out from her waist. He threw his jacket onto the bed, moving to stand behind her.

“How do you do this?” he muttered, their eyes meeting in the reflection.

“What?”

He took a while to answer, his hands coming up her legs, the material of her dress tagging along a little before falling back down as he placed his palms on her hips softly.

“How is it that you reduce me to a mess of a man with just one look at you? How is it that I saw you in this dress and _immediately_ I decided…” he trailed off, his touch becoming demanding as he gripped her hips, pressing himself against her backside, groaning into her ear at the contact. “… that I must have you or I will go insane?”

Her response died on the tip of her tongue as she saw a glint in his eyes, and second later he was pulling her dress up and over her hips, exposing her to the cool air of the room. Her hands fell onto the smooth surface of the table of her vanity, watching in the reflection as he smoothed the skin of her thighs with a dark look on his face, before, without even a slightest warning, plunging two fingers into her already wet entrance. She whimpered, her whole body moving forward in surprise, as he set an impossibly frustrating pace.

“Christ, you are so ready. Is this what you wanted to achieve with this dress?” he asked as he moved her hair behind her shoulder, exposing her neck to his attack. He placed openmouthed kisses there, careful not to leave any traces behind as her hips started moving along with his hand, riding his fingers, her moans becoming needier and bolder with each moment that passed.

He removed his fingers from her, licking them clean as he caught her eyes in the mirror, before he undid his pants, pulling her closer to him. Positioning himself behind her he wrapped one arm around her, pressing his lips to her ear.

“I’m going to take you roughly, and I want you to be loud, Don’t hold back, we are alone. I want to hear you, sweetheart.” He said as he pushed in one smooth motion, watching as her face melted at the intense feeling of pleasure.

She breathed softly, a sound much more arousing and erotic than any moan could ever be. He set a relentless pace, their bodies meeting, time and time again, the vanity sliding on the floor, various bottles on top of it shaking and clinking against each other. Claire’s head fell forward, her fingers curling around the edges of the table, knuckles turning white as she pressed her hips back towards him as his went forward, meeting him thrust for thrust.

Ethan gripped her hips, taking a few steps back to make her lay lower on the vanity, the angle changing, and along with it, the intensity of their actions. Her moans got louder, his groans deeper and their moves got needier as they climbed higher and higher, faster and faster to the eventual climax that took them both in one moment of hot, blinding ecstasy.

Their deep breaths filled the air in the room as he retreated from her, getting his pants back on and helping her straighten her dress to its previous state. She turned around to him, smirking as she pressed a soft peck to his cheek.

“Was that my present? Cause let me tell you, if it was, then I want to have birthday every day.” She mused, her arms wrapping around his back. He laughed, a deep rumble reverberating in his chest as he looked down at her.

“Is that so? I’ll be sure to give it to you more often then. But no, it’s not your gift. And I’m not going to tell you what your gift is until the evening. You’ll just have to be patient.”

“Like you were just minutes ago?” she teased, earning another one of his gorgeous laughs.

“It would be great if you showed more restraint than I did. Now, let’s go, or we’ll be late, and Naveen will have our heads.”

\--- --- ---

Ethan opened the door for her, stepping in after her, only to be met with… darkness. The lights were turned off, it was quiet and that alone made them confused. He was about to say something when the lights came back on, revealing at least fifteen people standing before them. He noticed his family, Naveen and… he wasn’t sure who the other half of guests were, but one look at the woman next to Naveen told him everything he needed to know. Claire’s family was there too.

“Happy Birthday!” they all screamed, balloons flying and colorful sprinkles raining down from the ceiling. Claire’s laughter filled the room as she took in the scenario before her. One by one, she noticed all the members of the Ramsey family, then from her own, Naveen being the last one she saw. And then she spoke to Ethan, who was still by her side.

“Was this your doing?” she asked before turning to him. If she saw him before speaking, she wouldn’t have done that. Mainly because he had a mildly terrified look on his face. The realization dawned on her like a flash. It was her family, who knew about him, and they were here. He was nervous. “Hey, don’t worry. Come on, I’ll introduce you, okay?”

They made their rounds, everyone from the Herondale family welcoming him warmly, even her father, which made Ethan breathe a sigh of relief. But it was not over yet. Her mother was standing next to Naveen, an unreadable look on her face as they approached her.

“Mrs. Herondale, it’s a pleasure to meet you-“

“Yes, I know. Now, let’s get to it. Did you learn your lesson?” she interrupted him, waving her hand impatiently.

“Yes, ma’am.”

“Are you going to pull anything like this again?”

“Wouldn’t dream of it.” he responded, his voice wavering just a tiny bit, but his eyes were level and strong.

She measured him with a straight face before a wide smile erupted on her lips, pulling him to her for a tight hug. He wasn’t sure what was happening, but when Claire nodded with a grin, he hugged Ana back, calming down a little.

“You can relax, I see the way you look at her. Just know that I can and I will end you if something happens to her. And now for the fun part.” She winked at Claire, leaving them both alone again. They both had a question in their eyes, but neither knew about the surprise, so that only left…

“Naveen.” They said at the same time, laughing as they turned to the older doctor. He raised his hands in defeat, smiling at them enigmatically.

The day went by in a blur, filled with dancing and singing and eating and talking. The two families actually got along very well, the conversations flowing freely. By one point of the party, Ethan and Claire found their way to the dancefloor, in each other’s arms, swaying softly to the slow song that was playing in the background. Their eyes were closed, both in their own little world, and when the song ended, they made their way to the table, where both of their parents were sitting, their mothers sitting together and fathers on the other side. Claire’s ears picked up on the conversation the two women were having.

“We should have her have flowers in her hair, like- yeah, exactly like that. And he can have the same ones in his pocket.” Her mother gushed about something excitedly.

“What are you two talking about?” Claire leaned in, wanting to join in on the fun.

“Your wedding.” Louise smiled brightly as she grabbed Claire’s hand.

It just so happened that all three men were drinking when the answer left her lips. The whole situation was one of the most hilarious things Claire has seen. At the same time, all three of them choked on their drinks, coughing and leaning onto the table. Claire laughed so much, tears fell from her eyes, patting Ethan’s back to help him get over his moment of surprise.

“Are you okay? Relax, it’s just a wedding, there are far worse things.” She laughed, leaning down to kiss his cheek before turning to her mother and Louise with a smirk.

\--- --- ---

The day ended as it began, with both of them back at his apartment, out of their clothes and in bed. Wrapped tightly in each other’s arms after they came down from their high. He stroked her hair as her head laid on his chest.

“Did you enjoy your birthday?” he hummed, looking down at her. Their eyes met and she smiled, nodding.

“Very. Thank you for making it so special.”

“Don’t thank me yet, it’s not over. I still have your present.” He moved to stand up, walking over to the bookshelf, retrieving an envelope of some sort before going back to her. “Happy Birthday, Claire.”

She opened it slowly, looking up at him every few seconds in excitement. Inside were two plane tickets. To New York. For a whole week. Her eyes snapped back to him, sparkling in excitement.

“Are you kidding me? What is this about?” she exclaimed while laughing, a look of utter disbelief on her face.

“Well, I did promise Lin to make sure you get to New York soon, and I figured now would be the best time. Naveen granted us time off, we can start packing tomorrow and be there in two days. Just say a word.” He said, looking at her with intense adoration. She threw herself at him, kissing him deeply as she giggled.

“I can’t believe you did that. It’s the best gift I ever got, oh my- thank you, Ethan.” She whispered, nuzzling their noses against one another.

“No, thank you. Thank you for giving me another chance. Thank you for letting me try again, for letting me right my wrongs. Thank you for letting me be by your side. It’s where I always want to be.” He stopped, gathering her in his arms to pull her closer to him, their eyes locked. “I love you.”

Her green irises sparkled in surprise that quickly melted into the most radiant light he has ever seen.

“I love you too.”

She pressed herself tightly to him, kissing him like there was no yesterday, no today and no tomorrow. Only them and their little bubble of a world they created around themselves. Falling for him was like falling asleep, slowly, and then all at once. And she wouldn’t have it any other way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading, I hope you enjoyed the ride! <3  
-P


End file.
